StoneToss: Episode 30 (Special Edition 1)

Warning: This is an extra long post. tl;dr: thanks for reading and helping the blog grow, I have plans to update and expand it in the near future so ~stay tuned~

First of all, thanks to everyone for helping my blog reach 100k views. It’s still going stronger&longer every day, even as we reach a whopping thirty posts on StoneToss. Even at the rate I’m going, there’s still so many stupid fucking StoneToss comics that need to be covered. But I’m dedicated to doing it, if you’re dedicated to reading it. Together we can enjoy the raw stupidity that is StoneToss for months, years, decades(?) to come.

As part of the celebration in hitting 100k and also to commemorate the 30th post (which just so happens to coincide with the 100k views) I am planning several pretty major updates to this blog. I started writing this thing a little over a year ago, in early October 2019. It’s crazy to think it was a whole year ago, but here we are. Originally I posted a chunk of comics all at once, though the attention I got was pretty sparse. I actually kind of abandoned the blog for many, many months as I got busy with IRL bullshit. The whole Covid thing happened, though, and I was unemployed for awhile making phat stackz from unemployment. During this time I decided to pick up this blog again, and the reception I got upon returning to it was far more attention from readers. In just five months the blog shot up in daily traffic and it’s encouraged me to get more serious about what this blog is.

I’ve recently begun doing two comics each post in an effort to burn through the excessive catalogue of StoneToss’ work. More recently I’ve settled on a scheduled format for updates. I have more big announcements planned for the immediate future, so keep an eye on this stupid little blog of mine.
I want to thank the subreddits that allow me to post my work on them. They’ve been crucial to getting people to notice what I’m doing. I also want to thank all of the people who read my blog and enjoy what I am doing. I want to thank people who leave stupid comments about what a drone I am or how my blog sucks, your petulant trolling adds much needed flavor to my work. Foremost, however, I want to thank StoneToss, for who’s comics this blog would not exist without. Just as a great artist needs a muse, so to do I need a whiny, bigoted man child from which to craft the art of my trade. Thank you all. 
Please, subject yourselves to an XXXtra long installment of StoneToss Is An Idiot.

Comic Name: Star Mangled Banner
Description: Inspired by the latest push for the USA to intervene in the middle east.
Mouseover: No more wars for Israel.
Image Name: pledge-of-allegiance-comic.png
Originally Published: 4/10/2018

What The Comic Is: A boy sits at a school desk, one of his legs mangled badly and bent at a highly unnatural angle. The intercom tells the students to prepare for the pledge of allegiance, to which the student scoffs. His teacher lambasts him for his attitude, recounting the deaths of friends who died while protecting the flag. The kid asks Mr. Jones if he’s lost his glasses again, and the last panel shows Mr. Jones confused as Israel’s flag flies behind him in the classroom. 

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Jews Will Not Replace Us.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: The country of Israel defines itself as Jewish. The historical holy land of Jews, Christians and Muslims, it contains the holy city of Jerusalem. How Jewish is Israel? It puts the Star of David, primary symbol of modern Judaism, on its flag. You could say that the country Israeli Jewish, ahahaHAHAHAHAH.

Conservatives don’t generally promote the USA’s involvement in foreign affairs, unless a Republican President promises weapons of the new, clear variety. And if there’s a bunch of oil that wealthy politicians can get their fingers into. Maybe StoneToss was critical of the USA’s past involvement in the middle east, or maybe he was alright with it because we were invading countries full of oil instead of ones just full of (((other stuff))). Anyways, point being is that in 2017, US President Donald Trump came out with his announcement that the USA would begin to recognize the city of Jerusalem as being Israel’s capital. Why this is important is a very complex issue that we won’t really get into here, as there’s no good way to explain it without an essay on the history of the city, the country and the people living in it. The best summary I could give you is that Jerusalem is a city roughly divided into an east half and a west half (think like east and west Germany, complete with a separating the two). Israel claims to own both halves while Palestine claims the eastern half. The status of what the fuck Palestine even is, as a government entity and which countries recognize its status, is also up for debate. Anyways, the city is divided into two with disputed borders and government rule. Trump’s move to recognize Jerusalem as Israel’s capital was then to recognize the entire city as being under Israel’s control; a highly criticized political move by many other governments. 

SoooOOOooo, other than being very complicated with varying stances between Jerusalem and Palestine on who governs what and how officially they govern it, what the fuck do the Jews have to do with this? Like I said before, Israel considers itself a Jewish state. StoneToss does not like Jews. Putting two and two together, yet? This comic is therefore a ridiculous slippery slope fallacy in which StoneToss equates US pro-Israel policy to Jewish undermining of the United States, eventually taking the entire country over somehow. Trump’s stance on Israel has been a point of contention with some of his followers, for these supporters adept enough to even understand the situation (or at least understand biased, anti-Semitic hot takes concerning it), they are conflicted. They supported Trump because he was anti-black and brown people, but he falters at being anti-Jew. StoneToss is incapable of stopping short of simply not wanting the USA to involve itself in foreign affairs and has to turn it into an issue of not wanting to aid Israel specifically, because then that means (((((((((((((they))))))))))))))) are influencing America, which obviously means the Jews are going to replace America. Obviously.

Funny enough, while StoneToss would go on to make another somewhat pro-Trump comic (that references Jews; we’ll get to it eventually on this blog) and while StoneToss has riffed on “establishment Republicans” in the past, this strip seems to be the start of a chill between StoneToss and Trump. I guess it’s true, you can be the caricature of everything StoneToss could ever want in a President and the second you stop short of full-on genocide of the Jews you’re now a cuck.

Comic Name: Tax Abrasion
Description: Happy Tax Day!
Mouseover: Around tax never relax 
Image Name: paying-taxes-comic.png
Originally Published: 4/17/2018

What The Comic Is: Two men sit alongside one another on a park bench. The first comments that paying taxes is a waste. His friend argues that taxes are the price of living in civilized society. In the third panel, it is revealed that common core, war in the middle east and gay police are all components of “civilized society”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Taxes are bad, everything taxes pay for is bad and more Jews Will Not Replace Us nonsense. 

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: StoneToss likes to think of himself as some post-post-irony meta Libertarian so it’s very little surprise that he dislikes taxes; he’s made previous comics and statements about them before, after all. The meat of this comic is just ‘TAXES BAD’, using cherry picked examples such as Common Core (a newer form of schooling used in tax-funded public education that has admittedly well deserved criticism drawn toward it), or… gay police? I don’t get it. Does StoneToss think police are gay? Does he think a special unit of police exist that solely handle gay criminals? I honestly don’t fucking know what’s gay about the police, or why StoneToss would be anti-police. Nothing happened around the time of the comic’s publishing that involved any type of specific news or controversy surrounding gay people or police that I can find. I suppose if anything the takeaway is just that the police allow gay people to serve as officers? StoneToss is nothing if not an absolutely raging homophobe (in addition to everything else he phobes) so it makes sense, I guess.

But the creamy, melted buttery topping of this steak of idiocy is the newspaper. “WAR IN THE MIDDLE EAST AGAIN!” reads the headline. And as if the last comic wasn’t on the nose enough with the anti-Semitism, StoneToss feels it’s very necessary to add a wringing pair of hands (obviously meant to be an offensive caricature of Jews) to very subtly and very intelligently make this about Israel and the Jews. He could’ve just left the comic at Common Core and wars and offended very few people, just making it your average Libertarian-leaning “I hate taxes” comic. But StoneToss literally can not do anything if it isn’t bigoted against at least one group of people, so here we are. Obviously StoneToss was still feeling upset about Donald Trump, Hitler 2.0 for hopeful young StoneToss, and the Presidential stance on Jerusalem. 
Of course, StoneToss wants to believe the Jews have already infiltrated America’s government. Trump is only a (((puppet))) propping up Israel so the Jews can take over America oh my god wake up people can’t you see that Obama’s name spelled backwards is Jew if you replace the A with a J and the M with an E and the B/O with a W??? Also obviously taxes are a tool of the Jews so they can destroy America with public education (education being the enemy of all bigots) and infrastructure that supports everyone (supporting everyone being the enemy of all bigots).

Now please join along with me in the customary taxing of the gay police officers.

 Comic Name: Founding Bothers
Description: Manifest Destiny can stop at the coasts.
Mouseover: “Give Arabs liberty, or give me death” – every 21st century president 
Image Name: middle-east-wars-comic.png
Originally Published: 5/1/2018

What The Comic Is: A man rushes to the side of George Washington, informing him that the Ottoman Empire is causing trouble in the middle east. The man asks Washington if troops should be deployed. After a blank-faced look, Washington dismisses the concern with a rhetorical question about shit in the middle east.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: George Washington didn’t care about the middle east, therefore America shouldn’t care about the middle east over 200 years later. Oh yeah, this is also still about the fucking Jews if you didn’t follow along with that.
 
Why It’s Fucking Stupid: I was originally planning to skip over this comic, as after the previous two installments, StoneToss went on a brief binge of comics that were a little too basic to bother covering on this blog. However, I figured it was important to talk about two things. Firstly, why “but muh founding fawters” is a stupid argument and Nextly, that this is still a comic whining about the aforementioned fucking Jews.

Even if you don’t care much about history, the Ottoman Empire is a name you’ve probably heard before. It was a big ass empire of states that existed for, frankly, a pretty damn long time. From 1299 to shortly after the first World War in 1922, the empire of the Ottomans existed in various sizes across parts of the middle east, Africa and eastern Europe. Existing for over 600 years, it’s not hard to see why their motto was “The Eternal Empire” and why we named a piece of furniture after them. By the time Washington was President of America, the Ottoman Empire was already almost half a millennium old. 

StoneToss cherry picks. He cherry picks because he is a fucking idiot. He has no arguments unless he carefully and deliberately picks what parts of reality to base his arguments on. Sure, Washington was at many times in his Presidency strong against America interfering with foreign countries (especially those across the ocean). It’s true that by today’s standards, these views of Washington would be regarded as incredibly isolationist, but this is a specifically picked element of Washington’s leadership and it lacks all context. Washington’s isolationism came from a need to prioritize America first; not because Mexicans were moving into California, but because the nation was entirely new and entirely on its own. It fought for independence on the aid of foreign governments and needed to build up its own military and cement its own economy and trade, to say nothing of building the rest of the country. They didn’t have the capacity to fight a war in the middle east when Washington was President. It barely had a navy, let alone any ships. 
StoneToss tries to suggest the founding fathers would never go to war with the middle east by using Washington as a mouth piece for his own beliefs. Very oddly enough, however, the USA would be entering the First Barbary War in 1801. This war was fought by Sweden and the USA (just the USA after 1802) against the ‘Barbary States’ (and also Morocco). The Barbary States, while autonomous, were provinces of the Ottoman Empire. But it doesn’t stop there! The USA would have other wars with the Ottoman Empire, culminating in an obscure conflict modernly referred to as World War 1. I guess in the end, the USA really did care about the Ottoman Empire. Funny.

This isn’t the first time StoneToss has said something stupid and backed it up solely with “BUT THE FOUNDING FATHERS…”, motherfucker, they lived 200 god damn years ago. The inherent issue with citing literally anything about them is that you need to make an argument as to why or why not their policies and actions are relevant to our time in the present. Of course, StoneToss know this, which is why he knowingly cites George Washington in a way that is intentionally dishonest.

Comic Name: Insect Man
Description: Soyper Heroes.
Mousover: Some stupid lennyface
Image Name: bugman-comic.png
Originally Published: 5/3/2018

What The Comic Is: Ant-Man followed by Spider Man are displayed on the big screen at a film theater. In the third panel, an overweight Marvel fan is ecstatic at seeing his favorite heroes.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Liking movies makes you fat and a consumer and taxation is theft but spending your money on anything other than Bitcoin is stupid.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: So this comic actually confuses a lot of readers because it hinges on an obscure reference to a new slang, “bug man”, used around places like 4chan’s /pol/ board (the political forum of 4chan) to refer to anyone who is a “mindless consumer”. It is also used as a racial slur as well, against any race considered to be especially consumer-centric (like many Asians). The insult is as childish and sterile as you can possibly fucking be without devolving straight into Ned Flanders-esque yodly-dodly gibberish, yes.

The comic therefore has a double meaning. StoneToss is mocking a supposed lack of creativity from Marvel because two of their dozens of characters are themed after insects (or rather, one is an insect and the other an arachnid, but close difference either way), while also mocking people who spend money to see the characters. I mean, one is ANT man and the other is SPIDER man! They’re like THE SAME GUY and you spend money to see BOTH their movies! *Slaps forehead* I mean, wow I just mean can’t you see I mean, wow I just mean *exasperated sputtering*.

I love how StoneToss took the time to draw two of the chairs in the audience empty, lol. Yeah, that’s the SiLeNt MaJoRiTy who don’t waste their money on movies like soy cucks and instead invest in BITCOIN so they can lose all of their fucking investment in an unstable digital currency. StoneToss doesn’t like ANY pop culture and consumes NO media he lives in a one-room house with NO FURNITURE or PICTURES HANGING UP and he drinks only RAIN WATER he collects from the case of his 2004 Gateway PC because spending money on ANYTHING makes you a CUCK and FAT and you eat SOY and you’re a BUG.

Comic Name: Wagging the Dog
Description: Sup, dawg? 
Mouseover: Hm, are all dog breeds created equal?
Image Name: dog-breed-intelligence-comic.png 
Originally Published: 5/10/2018
What The Comic Is: A man and his son observe some dogs. The son asks his father why dogs are so wildly different from one another. The man answers that it is their breed. The son asks why dog breeds are such different sizes, to which the father answers that it is their genes. The son asks why some dogs are ‘clever’ and others are not. The father stammers and a bead of sweat rolls down his forehead as he explains that it is the result of purely economic factors.
What StoneToss Actually Thinks: That humans are dogs and black people are stupid because of their genes.
Why It’s Fucking Stupid: This is one of a few comics I couldn’t wait to get to. It’s a bit satisfying to end such a large post on, really. But anyways, dogs. Humans are apes of the genus homo (lol). Dogs are… well, dogs, of the genus canis. What I’m highlighting here is that humans are not dogs. StoneToss is not a stranger to false equivalency, and there’s not an equivalency much falser than comparing dogs to humans.
Obviously the comic is a riff on “all colors of human are equal” and the fact that black people in countries like the USA face struggles that put them at societal and financial disadvantages. Instead, StoneToss tries to show us how ridiculous it would be if we referred to intelligence between dog breeds as being due to ‘economic factors’. I mean, yeah, that’d be a pretty stupid fucking thing to say when you consider that dogs don’t have an economy or any concept of money. 
Dogs have been selectively and intentionally bred by humans in such a way that has significantly altered almost every different aspect of them, from their colors/shape/size/temperament and their general levels of intelligence. Do you know what humans haven’t been selectively breeding traits into? Humans. I mean, some humans did try that once before, actually. We called them the Nazis.
And I’m sure you could selectively breed any kind of human you wanted, given enough time. Maybe we could create full-on “breeds” of human, from the mountainous Great Australian Longleg to the diminutive Teacup Korean. Can you imagine the fucked up skeletons and muscular structures we could breed into our fellow man?! Sigh, if only we had the time. 
However, until that fateful day, it remains that we don’t selectively breed traits into humans and therefore we are all very commonly related in terms of body shape, size, color and intelligence that vary not across ‘types’ or ‘breeds’ or ‘colors’ of human, but rather across individuals. 
It’s not a surprise that StoneToss doesn’t understand dogs very well, though. He probably doesn’t ever hang out with any of them. After all, dog the best friend of man; not of spineless unfunny bigots who awkwardly avoid looking black guys in the eyes when in public, lest their repressed interracial cuckold fetish give them a raging 3 inch boner in public.
Thanks for reading this stupid blog. Here’s to 100k more views and 100k more StoneToss comics!
Edit: 100k StoneToss comics is way too many, now that I think about it. Let’s shoot for, I dunno. Maybe 50, 60 more?

StoneToss: Episode 29

Comic Name: By Any Other Name
Description: Noticing patterns.
Mouseover: Reminder that pollen is plant skeet, and your girlfriend gets covered in it when she sniffs the flowers you bought her.
Originally Published: 4/3/2018

What The Comic Is: Two roses sit in a field, surrounded by a second type of flower. There are no other roses left. One rose cautions the other that the term “invasive species” is a rose supremacist dog whistle.
What StoneToss Actually Thinks: That it’s strange we refer to invasive plants and animals as “invasive species”, but not to humans who are “invasive” into other countries.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: So the purple flowers in the comic appear to be Purple Loosestrife, an invasive flower species that is spreading in parts of North America. It’s important to note that there is a distinction between a non-native species and a species that is invasive. All invasive species are non-native, but not all non-native species are invasive. 

What makes a non-native species an invasive one? The simple answer is that they somehow extraordinarily harm the native environment they’re invasive to. This can be naturally (killing or harming native species of animal or plant) or economically (causing monetary loss to the humans living in the environment, such as by growing out of control and ruining roads and other infrastructure). For instance, apples are not native to anywhere in the world outside of central Europe, however they are not an invasive species in the areas where they are now grown across the world. Though apple trees can potentially kill native plant species as they compete for resources, they don’t do so on a scale that is significant enough to impact native life, as they are not suited to unfairly outcompete native lifeforms.
On the other hand, the Purple Loosestrife flower kills hundreds of acres of native flower and plant life every year, due to a pollination window that is much larger than any other native plant. Longer pollination window = more plant sex = more germinated seeds = more Loosestrife = outnumbers and outcompetes native species. 

It’s all simple plant sex biology, really. But hey, you wanna know what doesn’t involve plant sex or invasive species? Human fucking beings. The majority of, say, Mexican immigrants to America are hard working people who contribute to their society, even when they are exploited as cheap labor. Funny enough, there is no “Mexican fuck window” that lasts longer than native USAians (who were the Native Americans, by the by) that enables them to outnumber and outcompete the “native species” in the USA (which doesn’t make sense, as all humans are the same species, anyways. So we can’t have ‘invasive species’ of humans, unless you want to make the uncreative comment that aLl hUmAnS aRe InVaSiVe111!!). 

StoneToss is trying to highlight some sort of hypocrisy he thinks exists where we call an invasive flower species “invasive”, but we don’t call a a “human species” invasive; to infer that PC culture stops us from calling non-whites “invasive species” even as they… steal all the sunlight and nitrogen in the soil? Or whatever it is that StoneToss thinks Mexicans do. Even as the two roses are outnumbered and threatened by the Loosestrife, the one still reminds that referring to the Loosestrife as what it is (an invasive species), is racist. Just like in real life!! The Mexicans are ruining Amurica and if you call them out for it then people think you’re racist, even as they themselves are wiped out by the loco Chicanos. 

Funny enough, Mexican and black people aren’t flowers or animals and therefore aren’t harmful to the native ecosystems of any other area on earth. Because no, StoneToss, the neighborhood/state you desperately don’t want colored people to move into and start families in is not an ecosystem, you racist, xenophobic dumbfuck. Also, “invasive species” is a scientific term recognized as legitimate and with unbiased definition, so no flower would call it a dog whistle, even if they could communicate. Unlike actual racist dog whistles, which are not scientific or unbiased and are only employed by people who are invasive species to humanity’s collective intelligent thought. People like StoneToss, for instance!

Comic Name: Gun “Free”
Description: Lefties can’t even obey gendered bathroom signs, why would they think folks would bother with “gun free” signs?
Mouseover: >when your head office gets demonitized
Originally Published: 2/5/2018

What The Comic Is: YouTube’s Headquarters is pictured “before”; a sign reading Gun Free Zone stands in front of the building. In the second panel, “after”, the same sign stands as the building is wrapped in police tape and armed SWAT and Police Officers stand in front of each other.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Gun control doesn’t do anything.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: On April 3rd, 2018, 38 year old Nasim Najafi Aghdam entered the YouTube headquarters building in San Bruno California. Entering through an an exterior parking garage, Aghdam used an automatic pistol to wound three people. She then took her own life. 

This comic was published two days after this shooting took place, obviously in reference to it (the building, as can be seen from the sign, is YouTube’s HQ). YouTube was a ‘gun free’ zone, something that gun activists were quick to jump on in the wake of the shooting.

This goes back into topics already discussed in previous posts on this blog, but many gun activists are staunch supporters of the notion that “good guys with guns stop bad guys with guns” and that “gun free zones only protect criminals”. Never mind that it has been proven many times that armed citizens rarely stop gun violence. Never mind that Ahgdam entered the building in a vulnerable entry spot that was overlooked by security, thus making the attack a security issue and not a “we didn’t have guns to stop the person with a gun” issue. Yeah, let’s never mind those facts. If we actually minded them, then this stupid tragedy-exploiting comic would be incredibly fucking dumb and in even worse taste than it already is. We don’t want that, do we? DOOOO WEEE??

Isn’t it so IRONIC (it isn’t) that YouTube was gun free but then there are GUNS from the POLICE AND SWAT GUYS? Isn’t it SO IRONIC that crime is committed even though it’s ILLEGAL TO COMMIT CRIME? What could have possibly stopped this crime? Could it be better mental health infrastructure? Better wages for minimum income earners? Overall more money put towards improving livelihoods and financial prospects for all citizens? No, because then black and brown people would benefit! The answer has to be the most logical and fail-safe: SHEER ESCALATION OF FORCE111 Which has always been proven to work, for the record (lol no it hasn’t).

StoneToss and others try to argue that YouTube HQ’s gun free policy lead to this shooting, but funny enough it needs to be reiterated that Ahgdam exploited a flaw in the building’s security via entering into it from an external parking garage. She did not enter the building through main doorways or pass any security. Again, this tragedy was one of security flaw and not because everyone in the YouTube HQ wasn’t packing heat and turned a lone gunman incident into a bullet storm of confusion and further destruction. 
Here’s a hot take: StoneToss should put a sign in front of his head that says “Brain Free Zone” lmaos

StoneToss: Episode 28

Comic Name: Wetwork
Description: Today’s comic was contributed as a suggestion from the very talented HeheSilly Comics. You can check out her Gab here, and her twitter page (run by a fan) here.
Mouseover: Guns don’t kill people, coat hangers kill people.
Originally Published: 3/22/2018

What The Comic Is: A woman holds a sign, obscured by her talk bubble. She explains that banning abortion would merely result in people seeking abortions in an unsafe and illegal way. She then questions the man she’s speaking with, wondering why he asked. In the third panel, her sign is revealed to read “BAN GUNS”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: That abortions are guns. 

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: HeHeSilly Comics appears to be an irregularly updated comic by someone who is a bizarre mixture of the “very le random aesthetic” that is normally reserved for hyper-liberal Tumblrites mixed with raging pro-Trump anti-leftist sentiment. Imagine if StoneToss comics were even more basic, slightly less openly bigoted and instead of tracing Shmorky he traced anything you’d find on r/comics. That’s HeHeSilly Comics. Just in case you were wondering if anyone who likes StoneToss’s comics was any smarter than StoneToss himself, well, it turns out: They Fucking Aren’t!

This comic is very reminiscent of an earlier comic featured on this blog, in which StoneToss, in his infinite wisdom and mental prowess, compared guns to weed. Not one to let their laughable stupidity be called into challenge, the heroic HeHeSilly Comics rushed in, casually bumping StoneToss to the side. It was time to show this amateur how a real idiot makes ridiculous comparisons that don’t make any sense. Whispering into StoneToss’s ear like the serpent to Eve, HeHeSilly Comics imparted their vision. StoneToss’s eyes set like marble blocks. His jaw hung slightly agape. The taste of salt kissed his lip from the lone tear that ran from his eye. His penis stiffened from the confines of his unwashed gym shorts. It was too good. Why hadn’t he thought of it? How had this “HeHeSilly Comics” come up with something so intricate and yet so simple in its sheer idiocy? It should have been his. It would be his. 


“Hehe,” StoneToss feigned a laugh. “Yeah, that’s, er, that’s a really silly idea.”

“I know,” HeHeSilly Comics gloated, as she reached her hand into her pants to pull out a fistful of her own feces. Popping it into her mouth, she chewed away in triumph. 


HeHeSilly Comics turned away, hands on hips, soaking in their ego as they swallowed a mouthful of turd. StoneToss gripped hard on his stylus as he made to sit down as his tablet. He spared a single swift glance to make sure that HeHeSilly Comics was still ripe to be caught unawares. In one motion, his stylus flew through the air like a bullet, catching HeHeSilly Comics hard in the temple of their cranium. HeHeSilly Comics fell hard to the ground, making no attempt to break their fall. They were dead.

And then StoneToss made this shitty comic.

Look, this might really shock HeHeShitty Comics and StoneToss, but guns are not abortions. The issue with getting an abortion when it’s illegal and getting a gun when it’s illegal are entirely different issues. As you may well know, a popular pro-abortion argument is that, without legal means to seek abortion, women will undergo ‘underground abortions’, terminating their pregnancy in questionable or outright dangerous medical procedures or attempting to induce miscarriage through drug use. This is a human health issue. It is completely impossible to compare to the argument that “if guns weren’t legal, people would just get them illegally, anyways“. It’s literally two entirely different problems. 

You know, if StoneToss and his dumbass friends have really good arguments for gun control (for real), then why the fuck do all of these comics suck? Is false equivalency between firearms and coat hangers the best they can come up with? Maybe StoneToss is just envious. If he has to carry all of his shitty ideas to term and turn them into webcomics, then maybe everyone has to carry to term?

Comic Name: Educa-shun
Description: You don’t need the necronomicon to attain forbidden knowledge.
Mouseover: Around urban youths never relax.
Originally Published: 3/27/2018

What The Comic Is: A man fingers another man, demanding self-education. After his fingering, the man reads from a book. In the final panel, with a worried expression on the man’s face, it is revealed the title of the book is “FBI CRIME STATISTICS”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Disproportionate police action and arrest against black Americans is an accurate reflection of the rate crime is committed by all skin colors, and that the USA’s oppressive systemic racism has nothing to do with crime. 

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: This would be one of the first times StoneToss cites crime statistics. A normal white supremacist talking point are the “13/50” and “13/90” ratios that cite that 13% of the population (black), commit 50% of crime or 90% of murder/homicide. Whether this statistic is even true or not is very debatable, but even if blacks commit a larger percentage of crimes despite their population size, the question is: Why?

“That’s easy!” StoneToss laughs. “It’s because they’re naturally inclined to violence and their IQs are lower. It just makes sense. If you’re an idiot.” 

Yeah, let’s ignore the hundreds of years of systemic oppression that is baked into the very foundation of the USA as a country, something that still persists to this day. Let’s ignore the generational poverty many blacks have been stuck in for the last one hundred and a half years or so. Let’s also ignore that there are simply not nearly as many white communities in this country that are as impoverished and lacking of advantage as there are black communities, so even trying to find fair comparisons is literally impossible. Let’s ignore studies that show when financial and living situations improve, crime goes down at the same rate among all communities across the country. Nah, it’s just because black people listen to rap and don’t have fathers and deal drugs and have low IQs and own pit bulls and fuck StoneToss’s wife while he watches at the foot of the bed on his kne-OH SHIT STONETOSS YOU ACCIDENTALLY DEVELOPED AN INTERACIAL CUCKOLD FETISH WITH YOUR NON-EXISTENT FEMALE LOVE COMPANION AGAIN, GO BACK MAN GO BACK GO BACK GO BACK. 

What’s funniest about this comic is, like usual, it makes an actual point; that crime statistics in the USA are disproportionate. Most people would think “maybe the answer is that black people have been historically disadvantaged in this country”, but StoneToss doesn’t like that. If his race isn’t the best race, then what else does he have going for him??? His Shmorky art???? No. It has to be that black people are naturally inferior. After all, it’s what the Nazis believed, and StoneToss says he isn’t a Nazi. So it makes sense he believes the same thing the Nazis believed, because that’s how not Nazi StoneToss is.
I have a ratio I like to call the 1/100 ratio. 1 man makes 100% of StoneToss’s shitty webcomics. If black people supposedly have low IQs because of genetics, then what the fuck is StoneToss’s excuse for himself?
Oh yeah, and if StoneToss’s incredible nuance went above your head at all, the mouseover of the comic is a reference to the racist “Around blacks, never relax” motto (that doesn’t even really fucking rhyme). StoneToss IQ good. Black people IQ bad. Oog oog.