Comic Name: Faustian Bargain
Description: Papers, please.
Mouseover: at least their food is spicy, right?
Image Name: legal-immigration-hell-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/22/2019
What The Comic Is: A man stands before the gates of a literal hell-scape. He urges that the entrance to the realm of fire and demons be sealed off, though his friend interrupts that it’s okay as long as the demons come legally.
What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Legal immigration is just as bad as illegal immigration.
Why It’s Fucking Stupid: I love how StoneToss goes through the trouble of metaphorically representing Mexico as literal demon and bat-infested hell, but then feels he isn’t making the obvious comparison quite obvious enough so he directly spells it out with the mouseover, just so all of his very intelligent fans know exactly who he’s talking about.
We could spend more time talking about how big brain and layered StoneToss is with his direct comparison of Mexico as being actual hell, but let’s talk about the second man in the comic. This is perhaps just my interpretation may or may not be right, but the second man bears a hairstyle that is strikingly similar to how StoneToss draws Donald Trump’s hair. He has never, so far as this author knows, drawn hair quite like that on anyone other than Trump. It seems then, that the comic is complaining about Donald Trump’s immigration stance, which StoneToss seems to have originally hoped was a policy of literally “no immigration at all, no Mexicans allowed”, but is now unhappy to find that Trump was an advocate for some degree of legal immigration. Truly, you can tell that StoneToss is void of all xenophobia with a stance as neutral and fair as “NO IMMIGRATION AT ALL”.
The description is a reference to the occasional legal policy of “stop and frisk”, a form of legislation that gives law enforcement officers the ability to stop and search those they feel are suspicious, at their complete discretion. It’s been expanded into ‘stop and identify’, which in some states has given officers an authority to request to see identification papers, obviously targeted towards illegal immigration. There’s obviously a lot wrong with this, not least of all being that it’s preposterous to demand citizens keep verification of their identity on them at all times. StoneToss seems to be also referencing the indie game “Papers, Please“, a game where you play the part of a border control agent checking the legal documents of citizens in a fictional country reminiscent of Soviet-era Russia. Papers, Please is set in a dystopian fascist regime so it’s unclear* why StoneToss would draw reference to it when talking about his ideal vision of the USA.
A ‘Faustian Bargain’ is a quintessential “deal with the devil”, in which one sacrifices some deep moral fiber of their being in exchange for material possessions like wealth or power. Sort of like if you were to betray your closest friend in order to get a million dollars or something along those lines. What’s the ‘Faustian Bargain’ in this comic? Donald Trump is betraying his moral character by… not totally opposing all immigration? Perhaps he meant to imply that Trump was only trying to curry favor with voters by not being strictly anti-all immigration, thus selling out his morality in exchange for attracting more votes? It’s unclear what StoneToss was trying to imply with the comic title, but do rest assured that whatever it was, it’s fucking stupid.
*spoken in sarcasm
Comic Name: Deal Breaker
Description: More like Fart of the Deal…
Mouseover: Donald (((J))) Trump
Image Name: trump-border-wall-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/31/2019
What The Comic Is: Donald Trump addresses a crowd of people, rescinding his promise to build a border wall. Eventually, he offers natural barriers as a solution to the wall.
What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Trump is a Jew and a cuck because he didn’t build a based border wall and stop all Mexicans from entering the USA; also, StoneToss unironically believed Trump was going to actually build the wall.
Why It’s Fucking Stupid: It’s hilarious to go back and see how Trump-positive StoneToss was before he started making comics like this. Literally overnight he went from deepthroating Trump to accusing him of being an instrument of the “Jewish world order”.
One of Donald Trump’s biggest campaign promises in the 2016 election was that a border wall separating the entirety of the border between the USA and Mexico would be constructed, of unspecified height and thickness, and most ridiculous of all was that Mexico would somehow pay for it. You would have to immensely fucking stupid to ever think Trump was going to build a border wall, or that Mexico would actually pay for any of it. I mean, you’d need to be gullible on a level of an actual young child. So of course, StoneToss immediately bought it hook line and sinker. When Trump didn’t give him the thing that any functioning human over the age of maybe 11 or 12 knew was a promise that was totally impossible to ever keep, StoneToss got mad and called him a Jew.