Ben Garrison: Episode 2

Comic Name: The Spud In Chief

First of all: WHAT THE FUCK IS A POTATO REPUBLIC????????

Second of all: Ben misses the chance to title this character as “Mr. Joetato Head”, so because he’s as clever as a piss-soaked rag, instead we get the overly verbose “Mr. Potato Joe Head”. Which is as slick as anything else Ben Garrison has farted out from his geriatric yiffhole. And by the way, WHAT THE FUCK IS A POTATO REPUBLIC??????? I like how Garrison couldn’t manage to come up with any potato puns but seemingly felt he was obligated to make up at least a single one, so the one we get is completely fucking random. He literally busted his right hemisphere trying to think of any ways politics is mixed with food, and the best he could come up with was “banana republic”. And he doesn’t even make it into a pun, he just replaces “banana” with “potato”. This is the sum total of Ben Garrison’s creativity. Replacing one foodstuff with another.

Like, come on. I’m a reasonable person. When Ben Garrison puts pen to paper to make yet another artistic abortion, I’m not really expecting much. Honestly I’m not expecting anything. But Potato Republic? That’s the best you could do, Ben? It was such a bold and brash move to depict Joe Biden as a human potato, it’s tragic to let such a deep and ingenious political commentary go without at least a single proper pun. I’d have even accepted a “Do you have any tots I can sniff?“, but somehow Ben Garrison is too busy playing mobile gambling games and choking on his own stomach acid or whatever the fuck it is he does at the nursing home to come up with a single proper god damned joke about potatoes. Garrison’s work is already creatively bankrupt as it is, but this is even worse. This is the Idiot Conservative version of jangling keys in front of a baby. Oee, oee, goo goo gaga, Biden is a Mr. Potato Head! Isn’t that funny, white men between the ages of 35 and 70 who repress regrets of marrying the first woman that was tolerant towards their behavior of demanding sex in a backwards, borderline rape fashion?

Finally, political commentary for the every day man. Biden is a potato lol.