StoneToss: Episode 94

Sorry about how late I am with this week’s post. I’m considering moving the post date to Sundays, as currently I have much more time on the weekends for stuff like this. Ideally I’d love to have tons of hours on Sunday to write a lot of content at once so I can release much more weekly content through the week, but alas this is currently brainstorm fodder at the moment. I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon.


Comic Name: Suck the System
Description: Eat the rich, but make sure their tech investments run smoothly first.
Mouseover: Lumpenprole
Image Name: anarchist-on-twitter-rule-follower-political-cartoon.png
Originally Published: 4/7/2020

What The Comic Is: An Antifa pajama man spray paints an anarchist symbol on the side of TWITTER. Beside him, he notices another man is spray painting the first letters of a racial slur on the same TWITTER. The pajama man runs off in fear and alarm, crying that the second man is breaking the terms of service.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Antifa wants anarchy, but still wants an authority figure to dictate the use of racial slurs/hate speech.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: We can have a big, extended deep dive into anarchy and the rejection of governments that have inherently failed to protect/serve their own people, but that’s a bit unnecessary. It’s true that Antifa is somewhat aligned with feelings of anarchical revolution, but it’s sort of nuanced to, oh, you know… rooting out the authority figures who have failed all social contracts to not abuse their powers in a systematic way that is otherwise unstoppable short of actual pushback. You know how cowards like StoneToss outright fetishize “revolution”, calling upon the American revolution constantly as some kind of fever fantasy that they claim to be able to relate to? Yeah, in reality idiots like StoneToss would have been asskissing loyalists and not at all the revolution warrior he constantly wetdreams about being.

Because people like Antifa are actually fighting back against tyranny, hence some of their more anarchy-leaning desires. StoneToss and his fellow shills would have you believe Antifa are foaming at the mouth and eager to abolish all forms of society and government, but nah. Turns out you can in fact nuance everything, even anarchy. Opposition to police rule (because police rule has proven to be corrupt at all levels for decades/hundreds of years) isn’t the same as “let’s abolish all rules”. Funny enough, promoting anarchy against tyranny isn’t quite the same as the N-word, but you’d have to be a total fucking idiot to ever try making such a dumb and ridiculous compari- Oh right, StoneToss.

Also worth noting that, yeah, Twitter is a private platform that is free to choose who and what they allow to be posted. StoneToss and his shills desperately argue that Twitter/Facebook/social media in general should somehow be ‘federalized’ (kind of like, you know, something like a Socialism model) in order to protect “free speech”. What they really mean is that they don’t want private entities to censor them, which completely flies in the face of their typical standpoint of less government control and more power for private entities. This is because the core Conservative base, including its fringe associations such as the Alt-Right, are all a bunch of ‘have their cake and eat it too’ hypocritical fucking idiots.

Once again StoneToss employs the term “Lumpenprole”, this time he doesn’t even bother to use it as a pun or a joke or even part of a sentence. He just blandly states it, all by itself, in the comic’s mouseover, pulling back any doubt that he ever employed the word with any deeper thought or intelligence. To him it’s just an extra fancy and exotic version of “cuck” or “libtard” or “leftie” or any other random, childish insult/label he feels empowered by when he meaninglessly throws it at anyone he doesn’t like. The problem is that no one casually understands what it means and it’s too ‘heavy’ of a word (compared to something slick like ‘cuck’ or even ‘libtard’), and thus his limpdicked little attempt to mint “Lumpenprole” as some kind of Rightist zinger works about as well as everything else he tries to do.


Comic Name: Blue Balled
Description: Imagine this guy taking on the “big business”: (StoneToss embeds a YouTube video of Bernie Sanders being interrupted during a speech by a topless woman who is campaigning against the dairy industry).
Mouseover: FEEEEEEEEEL the Bern!
Image Name: bernie-sanders-endorses-joe-biden-political-cartoon.png
Originally Published: 4/9/2020

What The Comic Is: A group of men hold a Biden 2020 banner and cry out in unison that they will vote blue, no matter who. An offensive gay caricature wearing a Bernie t-shirt dryly fires back that he prefers a man with principles. Bernie Sanders is then shown to also be holding the Biden banner, much to the gay caricature’s deadpan chagrin.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Bernie should have let Trump win, I guess?

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: There’s not a lot to deconstruct in this comic. It’s basically just trying to make fun of Bernie Sanders/Bernie supporters. In the comic’s image name we can see StoneToss is commenting on Bernie’s support of Joe Biden, after it became clear Bernie had no chance of winning the 2020 election. In the description of the comic, StoneToss linked a stupid video of Bernie holding a rally where he was interrupted by a small group of protesters who were railing against the dairy industry. It was a very small and incredibly trivial moment that amounted to nothing of meaning, which of course means that StoneToss and his ilk desperately clung onto it as if anyone aside from them gave a shit.

Because wow, everyone knows you can’t be an effective president and leader if you get interrupted by a topless woman. And why would Bernie ever support Biden?! Does he have no principles?!?!? Clearly. If Bernie were a CHAD like Trump, he would have been a destructive and toxic entity that split his party to the point it can’t hope to win major elections like midterms or the presidency. Why did SLEEPY BERNIE eat the cuckpill and get a much better alternative to Trump into the White House??? Only WINNERS like StoneToss never compromise and therefore constantly lose, like a winner.

And for all the flak that shills gave Bernie for “kowtowing” to Biden, because Bernie knew when to reasonably concede defeat and move to aiding the next best thing other than himself, it sure is funny to (in present day) look at what Trump’s base (and Trump himself) have been doing when faced with defeat: a complete and total rejection of reality. Bernie’s acceptance of reality lead to a better chance of a Democrat winning 2020. Trump’s childish insistence of a ‘stolen election’ has lead to nothing but a further fragmented and eternally tarnished Republican party. I know that StoneToss values himself as a BASED CUMPILLED AMONGUS GAMER who rejects Donald Trump as readily as he does any Left-leaning candidate, so really this comic can’t be taken as a form of support for Trump (just a form of mockery towards Bernie), but it’s still amusing to reflect on the outcome of reality. Leftists so stupid cuck support each other for a greater good brrrrr lol cuck not like based Rightists who will deny reality and destroy themselves like VIKING BLOOD MEN from WHITE COUNTRIES.

Feel that, StoneToss? It’s the burn, you fucking clown.

StoneToss: Episode 93

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon. Fresh Ben Garrison stuff coming EVENTUALLY, daddy promises.

Yellow fever

Comic Name: Sociological Distancing
Description: Foreign Bodies.
Mouseover: Yellow fever
Image Name: multiculturalism-and-disease-political-cartoon.png
Originally Published: 3/31/2020

What The Comic Is: In the first panel, stereotypical representations of different countries all link hands together in a grassy field underneath a rainbow, ending with the USA. In the second panel, it is shown that to the USA is about to link hands with stereotypes of China and Italy, who are both seek and meek looking with green spots across their faces. The green field turns to darkness and the rainbow to rain clouds, much to the USA’s shock.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: We can never interact with other countries in order to stop diseases from transferring from them.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: If you keep up with each post on this blog, you may remember how the last post (episode 92) featured a StoneToss comic concerning Asian-American reporter Andy Ngo. In the comic, Andy Ngo is drawn with pure white skin (no color, the way StoneToss depicts white people, in fact he is drawn as non-stereotypically as possible, something StoneToss must have needed to put actual effort into doing). This is because StoneToss is honoring Andy Ngo as “one of the good ones”. Good non-whitey, giving us a leg to stand on! In this comic, StoneToss is demonizing the Chinese, and thus he takes the mask off, depicting the Chinese person as stereotypically yellow. If StoneToss was trying to fool anyone into thinking he wasn’t a useless, shallow bigot, he fucked up. This is assuming StoneToss was trying, though, as it’s very likely he wasn’t.

The symbolism is pretty simple. Every country links hands, but here come the “Covid countries” (Italy was getting hit pretty hard by the virus around the time of this comic’s publishing; you can see StoneToss very cleverly uses a piece of pizza, the only thing he can think of that’s Italian, to represent the Italy character). It seems as if infectious diseases are just as fickle and ever-changing as Asian skin color to StoneToss, because one moment he’s bitching about Covid being a hoax or being “not so bad” when he wants to whine about MUH LIBTERIES but then the next moment he utilizes Covid as a tool to legitimize anti-globalism/sealed borders. Is it a fake disease doctors only use for online social media points, or is it a deadly virus we have to close the country forever more over? It’s whatever StoneToss wants it to be in any given moment, because he doesn’t actually stand for anything or believe in anything further than satiating whatever childish feeling he’s currently failing to work through like an adult.

“Yellow fever” is a (derogatory) slang term for an Asian fetish (kind of like the even more derogatory ‘jungle fever’ for Black fetish). It’s also a casual medical term for illnesses like Jaundice! In this case, StoneToss is making an overtly racist comparison to Covid19 and ‘yellow fever’, i.e., that it’s the yellow fever, as in from China. Remember all the stupid “China Virus” jokes that unfunny bigots were spewing? Yeah it’s basically just one of those, very funny.

But let’s talk about the real meat of this comic. It’s an anti-globalism comic, arguing that mixing with other people results in the spread of viruses. This is true, of all the things we share between people, contagious pathogens are unfortunately going to be one of them. That’s just how it do be. However, using this as a key reason why the USA should build a massive border wall around itself and never contact outside countries ever again is shortsighted stupidity (StoneToss’ favorite kind of stupidity!).’

StoneToss may or may not be aware of this, and therefore may or may not care, but viruses can evolve and spread within single countries, especially ones as large as biodiverse as the USA. In fact, data supports that limiting the movement of people actually helps viruses spread, because it inhibits people from moving away from densely populated areas where viruses spread the easiest. Sure, in some fantasy world that can never exist, the USA could theoretically magically close off its borders so that absolutely no one from the outside world could ever enter it. That would have probably prevented a disease that developed in another country from ever spreading into the USA- well, except for pesky travelers who could travel from the USA to China, contract the virus, and then bring it back. But we don’t live in such a utopia, so we have to face the facts that viruses spread.

StoneToss is more than happy to deride and mock people for things like wearing masks or quarantining/social distancing, precautions to stop the spread of Covid, but he sure does like to tout the ‘solution’ of closed borders and anti-globalism, which are essentially just far more extreme (and really stupid) versions of the aforementioned precautions. Forget all of the cheap Chinese-produced things StoneToss undoubtedly purchases every day of his life. Forget all of the inventions created by other countries. All of the progress made in medicine, technology and society. What is important is closing off the border and living a nice, isolated existence until the USA contracts its own pandemic and can’t travel out of its own country because of the 70-foot tall red white and blue deathmechas who patrol the borders for anyone trying to get in or out.

Ask StoneToss the hypothetical “what happens when the USA contracts its own deadly virus and it kills everyone in the USA and you can’t escape to another country because everyone else has enacted the same border control you wish the USA had?” and he’ll give you some bullshit canned response of “If that happens it’s just survival of the fittest! It’s how capitalism works!!, if it happens to the USA then that’s just how things go, life isn’t fair!“, when in reality if this situation ever did happen to StoneToss, he’d the the first one to claw his way out of the country while screaming and crying about how evil everyone is for not letting him escape. What I’m trying to say is, fuck StoneToss.

TOEing the line

Comic Name: Foot in Mouth
Description: StoneToss links to a “purple square” variant of the same comic, where the bottom right corner is colored purple.
Mouseover: TOEing the line
Image Name: boot-lickers-political-cartoon.png
Originally Published: 4/2/2020

What The Comic Is: A political compass depicts four different sets of people, all licking the feet of their respective “rulers”, while all simultaneously accusing the others of boot licking.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: All sides are the same because they all kowtow to someone.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: StoneToss tried to make this an “all sides bad I’m so centrist I am very enlightened“, but see, this really doesn’t work. Because while the authoritarian Right is licking the boots of a Nazi, and the Libertarian Right licks the boots of a business tycoon, the Libertarian Left licks… a transgendered woman’s foot. Hell maybe it’s not even a trans person, StoneToss just nominally decided “hair leg = man lol”. It could just be a woman, but StoneToss thinks women are just as bad as trans people so does it matter either way?

Yes StoneToss, can’t we all just open our eyes?! Can’t we SEE that Nazis and tycoon capitalists are just as bad as trans people?!?!?! The Left is so bad with their ACCEPTANCE OF TRANS PEOPLE, just like the Right with their desire for fascism!! At the end of the day, we are all bootlickers because one side wants to kill brown people and let poor people die and the other side doesn’t want to do any of that. Truly, we all the same.

Fascism does not exist, or at least it can not operate as a government force, without actual bootlicking and submission to the powers in control. End game capitalism and cash monarchies can not exist without the complacency of those serving it. Trans people are just humans who want to fucking exist. Yes the far Left radicals with their kowtow worship of trans people, the way the TRANS AGENDA(tm) controls and influences everything they do, just like Nazis.

But of course, StoneToss doesn’t lick any boots. Such is the privilege of a man with the wherewithal to reject any and all groups of people (at least outwardly, because inwardly StoneToss is a raging fascist and will readily support any force that appears to be trying to install fascism in the government). StoneToss is so smart, unlike those total full mask off Nazi RPers and stupid Leftists who think Trans people, gay people, brown people and women should be allowed to exist.

StoneToss doesn’t lick any boots because he’s too busy licking shit. It takes one doozy-mamma of a shitlicker to think this comic isn’t completely fucking stupid, after all.

StoneToss: Episode 92

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon.


Comic Name: POZitive Affirmations
Description: I’m a feminist now.
Mouseover: YES.
Image Name: rape-culture-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Seemingly First panel, between the legs of the woman speaking. Thanks to a reader for catching this one.
Originally Published: 6/15/2021

What The Comic Is: A group of radical feminists of all ages stand united, crying out that they live in a rape culture. A man, with deadpan calmness, simply responds “Indeed”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Transgender people and feminists were raped.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Let’s get the references out of the way. The woman doing the talking in the first panel is wearing a Lesbian pride flag t-shirt. The little girl (probably meant to be a biological male) is wearing the colors of Gay pride on their dress. The epical funnie trans woman in the back, slightly obscured, is wearing a Minor Attracted Person (MAP) pride flag on their dress (Their breasts, also, aren’t drawn correctly, by the way. It’s like StoneToss started to give her normal looking tits but then was like OH YEAH I FORGOT TO MAKE HER TITS ORANGES BECAUSE I AM SO FUNNY, so he quickly doodled the oranges in but forgot to make them actually line up to the contours of the boobs). “POZ” is slang for “Positive”, specifically in reference to being HIV positive.

This is StoneToss’ super duper totally coded way of implying, yet again, that pedophiles are a legitimate part of the LGBTQ+ community. He slightly hides it in the background, putting it alongside the “ABORT HERE” shirt (a fucking hilarious t-shirt, by the way), StoneToss is trying to be clever with this visual metaphor. On the outside of feminism you have lesbians and gay children, but on the SPOOKY (((INSIDE))), you have abortion and transgender pedophiles!!1111. One can only dream of what unfathomable terrors which lurk behind abortion and pedophilia… could it be… no… no, it is!! It is!! The one behind the pedophile is wearing… A SHIRT SUPPORTING MULTICULTURALISM HOLY FCUK NOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo

Of course this comic also fits StoneToss’ new, and startlingly pathetic, style of depicting the people he doesn’t like as being enraged, irrational and aggressive while depicting his stupid little self-insert as calmly, almost nonchalantly, giving a terse response that ToTaLlY rEkTz TeH lIbTaRdErZ. You see this kind of stuff with far-right idiots like PumpkinFace or Hedgewik, or even Ben Garrison or your standard “literally who?” newspaper political cartoonist. It’s an end product of never, ever winning in real life. If you can’t win real arguments, just make up a power fantasy where you SHATTER the LIBTARDS with your SCATHING (but never too invested, remember: it’s cooler if you don’t care that much but still just enough to pee yourself and make a stupid baby power fantasy comic about it) Facts And Logic(tm)(r)(c).

All this to say that StoneToss’ incredible commentary is just “If you’re gay or transgender, you were raped/groomed and also you’re a pedophile, er, oh yeah also abortion too I guess, why not, OH, and also HIV”. A web spun from only the most Machiavellian of thread. Indeed.

The description, “I’m a feminist now.” is probably a stupid joke about StoneToss supporting feminism because it means supporting a culture where feminists/trans people are raped

A lefty's Yellow Peril.

Comic Name: Ngo Country for Bold Men
Description: Today we have a special bonus comic featuring Andy Ngo, journalist covering Antifa violence.
Mouseover: A lefty’s Yellow Peril.
Image Name: andy-ngo-antifa-political-cartoon.png
Originally Published: 3/30/2020

What The Comic Is: Photographer and journalist Andy Ngo holds his camera up to a grow up antifa and Starbucks-brandishing Communists. A sign held by one of the antifa pajama men reads “Gay Asian Nazi Go Home”.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Before we talk about why an idiot like StoneToss loves Andy Ngo so much, let’s talk about who Andy Ngo is. You can be forgiven for not really knowing who Ngo is, he’s pretty obscure and his fifteen nanoseconds of relevancy came and went pretty quickly, despite strange and confused efforts o n the part of far-righters (like StoneToss) to prop Ngo up as some “weapon” against the Left. See, here’s what you might not have noticed about Andy Ngo…. He is ASIAN….

…What does that mean? It means that, uh. Well. I don’t know what it means. I know what StoneToss thinks it means: that a guy who isn’t white thinks Antifa are thugs. What are the real world implications of this? Absolutely fucking nothing. The Right loves (well, loved) to tout the ‘alliance’ they had with Ngo, who is conservative-leaning and more than willing to fully sacrifice all integrity as a journalist in order to skew facts for his own reasons/gain. In the past, StoneToss has mocked conservatives for their ‘hero worship’ of conservative black people. With this comic, StoneToss completely reveals that this was (shockingly enough) not commentary made for the purpose of pointing out hypocrisy or foolishness of the Right, but rather it was just StoneToss upset that black people were being recognized by the Right as being important to their agenda. Because the second an Asian guy is running around and doing dumb shit for Right-winger media, StoneToss creates an almost mural-esque Nat Geo cover photo in his honor.

“Yellow Peril” is a racist notion that Asia (specifically China or other emerging potential super powers) are threats to “Western Society”. In the mouse over text, StoneToss asserts that Ngo is “a Lefty’s Yellow Peril”, but no one on the Left hates Ngo for being Asian. Maybe they’re slightly confused as to why a non-white person would be so supportive of far-Right conservatism (and the heavily white supremacist movements therein), but no one hates Ngo for his race. They hate him for being a Right-wing shill who constantly doxxes private citizens, constantly misrepresents facts in order to create false narratives and is usually found spouting off dumb Islamophobic shit.

Ngo’s meteoric rise to relevancy began in 2017, when he was fired from his job as multimedia editor at the Portland State Vanguard, a student newspaper at Portland State University. Ngo was fired for intentionally misrepresenting the quotes, via his personal fucking Twitter, of a Muslim student. After his dismissal at PSU, Ngo claimed he was canned for “Political Incorrectness”. It’s important to note that “They fired me for being politically incorrect!!” is a universal translation of “I was fired for being a bigoted dumbfuck”. Ngo created a mini fire on Twitter, and was quickly noticed by fine media establishments such as Breitbart News and National Review. This lead to several high years of Ngo doing more stupid shit while pretending to be a legitimate journalist, kicking up drama and causing problems and inciting people to attack him. It’s true that members of Antifa have physically assaulted Ngo, and this isn’t exactly justifiable. However, the narrative that Ngo is a brave reporter who simply wants to capture the ‘violence of Antifa’ is completely false. Ngo is only interested in creating drama to report on so he can try grifting money from stupid Conservatives. For all his hard work, Ngo was treated mostly the same by Right-wing compatriots: used as a Token Azn Guy until people stopped caring about him, and then discarded.