StoneToss: Episode 88

Thanks for all the kind words and support I’ve received from everyone in response to yesterday’s update. I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon.


Comic Name: Stumbling Block
Description: You are being legally discriminated against with no end in sight.
Mouseover: re-education
Image Name: critical-race-theory-and-school-stonetoss-comic.png
Amogus: The right-most pillar of the Affirmative Action building, the middle shadow/grime mark thing at the top of the pillar.
Originally Published: 7/6/2021

What The Comic Is: A worker smashes a black labeled “Critical Race Theory” on the steps of a Roman-esque building labeled “Affirmative Action”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Critical Race Theory is a ‘distraction’ to white people to make them forget that Affirmative Action exists.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: At the surface, this comic is StoneToss making commentary that CRT is being “destroyed” by the working white man, but in the background, Affirmative Action is still looming strong. In other words, CRT is the ‘distraction’ that allows Affirmative Action (which is far more powerful and established, with real implications) to continue standing.

But it gets messier the more you read into it. StoneToss is genuinely bad at making political comics. He can’t do it. He can make comics with a political message or commentary in them, but the idiot can’t make a one panel, label-centric ‘political comic’. He tries and fails every single time, because his views are too stupid and require too much explaining, thus he’s incapable of presenting them in any minimalist context such as a traditional political comic. It’s really tough to tell exactly what the fuck StoneToss means with this comic, or even who he’s trying to talk to.

Who is StoneToss talking to in the description? Is he talking about black people being discriminated against by Affirmative Action and CRT? Again, bigoted idiots like StoneToss love to argue that things like Welfare, Affirmative Action and CRT are all ‘actually racist’ because they somehow really harm black people. A very popular (among racists) argument against Affirmative Action is that it devalues the hard work of minorities by ‘up jumping’ their underqualified peers into grand positions such as surgeons or doctors. If you forget (or dishonestly leave out) that this is not at all how Affirmative Action works (you do not go from underqualified medical graduate to surgeon because of Affirmative Action), then this idiotic rationalization may look like a valid argument to some people. “Oh well, with Affirmative Action you’ll never be able to tell which black doctor worked hard to get there and which one got an easy ride and is a bad doctor, so it actually hurts the good black doctors!!”, but there’s a major piece missing in this seemingly ‘ultra woke’ hot take.

These racists never stop to wonder exactly why there’s not more minorities or women represented in medicine or STEM fields. To them, the answer is obvious: they believe there to be a distinct difference between the intelligence and capability of white people (sometimes, begrudgingly, they will acknowledge Asian and/or Jewish men as well) and women/other minorities. Self-awareness would tell them that this belief makes them the racist/bigot, but self-awareness isn’t usually this type of person’s strongest asset. So StoneToss and his fellow bigots attempt to repackage aid for the underprivileged as somehow being hurtful to the same underprivileged. It’s all bullshit and crocodile tears, though. They don’t give a fuck about Affirmative Action somehow hurting black people, they just don’t like equity or the idea that white people may miss out on an advantage that goes to a far more generally under-advantaged people. This is why you’ll hear them talk about “racism is when one race is valued over another” in relation to CRT or Affirmative Action. Again, however, the important missing piece is that minorities such as blacks and Latinos (and women) are coming off of hundreds of years of hard oppression that has left many of them badly disadvantaged.

It’s easy for the privileged to be blind to that disadvantage, and this in turn makes it easy for them to rationalize how that inherent disadvantage doesn’t really exist. This takes the form of ‘championing’ blacks who have made it as a doctor (“We can’t devalue this fine erm, ‘black man’, and his achievement by allowing other blacks to be doctors!!“), but the championing is fake and hollow, the black doctor is just being used as a tool to gatekeep more blacks from becoming doctors. The worst, and stupidest thing, about their rhetoric is that they actively acknowledge that there is an issue with black people or women entering into medical or technology fields, they just opt to put all the blame on the oppressed. Obviously it’s just because those demographics are lazy and naturally less inclined to knowledge, it can’t possibly be because the white man oppressed them for hundreds of years. They can satisfy their racism while at the same time completely washing their hands of the same racism of their forefathers. It’s easy to see why this rhetoric is so attractive to them, especially because it’s just so fucking stupid.

Check out this DANK queer in a Trump hat!

Comic Name: Friends Without Benefits
Description: Chasers of a different variety.
Mouseover: Check out this DANK queer in a Trump hat!
Image Name: gays-2nd-amendment-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/23/2020

What The Comic Is: A man in a Libertarian t-shirt holds up a sign reading that he wants gay married couples to protect their weed with guns. A pair of gay men, holding hands and wearing weed-leaf shirts, approach the Libertarian. One of the gay men leans over to a cop, pointing out the Libertarian as “the right-wing extremist”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Gay people don’t want liberty, they want special treatment and they will hate anyone who wants liberty and freedom.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Alright, quick pop quiz. What do you call someone who wants gay marriage, legalized marijuana and second amendment rights? You could describe them as being generally pretty left wing, they just happen to be a liberal who values gun ownership. Most liberals are pretty strong on gun control, but it’s not unheard of for there to be second amendment supporters on the left. StoneToss tries desperately to frame this as some kind of issue about gun control, as if the Left is all “No True Scotsman” and you have to follow their strict world view to the letter or else you’re seen as a raging Right-wing extremist. He then links gun control directly to Libertarians to lump them into the message.

Libertarians are supposed to be all about ‘personal liberty’, that people should be able to do as they please and that the free market and society will weed all the problems out. We’ve talked extensively on this blog before about how that this is more or less just used primarily as a cover for bigots to express their bigotry and how homosexuals need special protections in order to exist in most of the USA. The issue with a pure Libertarian view point is that it allows for discrimination based on the discriminator’s “personal liberty”, which therefore impedes on the liberty of another (by not allowing them to normally exist like everyone else). Liberty for the oppressor is lack of liberty for the oppressed.

So it really doesn’t matter what you call yourself. Labels don’t matter. You can be totally for gay marriage, weed and guns and no one is going to call you a Right-wing extremist. StoneToss is once again just unhappy that he can’t call for the extermination/expulsion of homosexuals without being called a homophobic bigot.

This comic has some layers, though. In panel 2, the gay couple look at the Libertarian as a friend. They’re smiling at him. In a typical StoneToss comic, they’d be drawn with disgusted or offended looks on their face. StoneToss would never pass up an opportunity to strawman gay people to the most ridiculous extent, that is, unless he had a reason for it. The reason in this case is that StoneToss is trying to suggest gay people will dishonestly support anyone who is “pro-Liberty for all” in order to gain support for something like gay marriage, but afterwards will turn on them and label them Right-wing extremists.

So quick, another pop quiz. If your political rhetoric includes the “right and liberty” to oppress another person, what are you? I’ll even give you a hint: Oppressing intolerance is not comparable to the intolerance.

Are you finished with your pop quiz? Did you answer “StoneToss is an idiot”? Great job, you got it right.


Hello sexy boys and sexy girls. I usually keep this business to somewhere like my Twitter, but I don’t use Twitter so not many people follow me there and considering this is fairly important for the future of the blog, I thought I’d make an actual blog post just for the sake of enough people seeing it. Very recently I just started a really, really amazing new dream job. Basically I’m going to be pretty busy doing it and, at least right now, I do not know if I can stay totally on top of doing 2 StoneToss posts (of 2 comics each) a week. For right now I am going to be moving to a single weekly post, every Thursday. This could probably change in the near future as I adjust better to working at my new job (I put in a lot of hours at it because I am insane), so I would predict that the next few weeks at least will just be a single StoneToss, with the occasional Ben Garrison post to tide you over. I love u all.

StoneToss: Episode 87

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon.

Hey, they're not hurting anybody...

Comic Name: Out In The Open
Description: Happy Pride Month! (this links to a paper written by raging homophobe Paul Cameron ((and his raging homophobe son)) concerning a supposed link between homosexual parents and rates of parent-on-child molestation)
Mouseover: Hey, they’re not hurting anybody…
Image Name: pride-parade-candy-van-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: To the immediate right of the back tire, a smudge/rust spot.
Originally Published: 6/3/2021

What The Comic Is: A pride parade marches down the street, a stereotypical “pedovan” in tow, with ‘FREE CANDY’ painted on its side.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Pedophilia is now openly associated with LGBTQ, the slippery slope of gay > trans > pedophile has been completed.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: StoneToss is no stranger to pushing the belief that eventually, gay and trans acceptance will lead to the acceptance of pedophilia. Never mind the ever present and ever consistent disavowal within the gay community of pedophilia. Pedophilic people may be constantly trying to worm their way beside the LGBTQ crowd, but they are also constantly being rebuffed and told that their attractions are not acceptable and will never be legitimized. But yeah let’s ignore all of this, obviously we’re one tiny inch away from Minor Attracted Person flags being waved through the air while pedophiles march down the street.

We can talk long and hard (lol) about people with pedophilic urges and how they should be able to seek and receive aid for it without overwhelming social stigma, but at the same time the position from everyone is clear: pedophilia will simply never be tolerated as an acceptable orientation. Pedophilia is like the one thing that literally everyone will agree on regardless of political allegiance or motive, because no one wants to ever be seen as “the congress member/mayor/governor/whatever who voted against the ‘stop the online pedos’ bill” or whatever. This is why the whole “GAY IS A SLIPPERY SLOPE” bullshit has always been weak and has always been kept to the sidelines, employed only by the most mask-off and stupidest of bigots who don’t have careers worth not ruining.

But let’s address the real gooey-wooey insides of what StoneToss is using this comic to say. An important element of any homophobe’s argument against homosexuality is to contest the benignity of gay people. It’s always something like “put 100 straight people on an island and you make more straight people, put 100 gay people on an island and they all die out“. These types of sentiments make no sense in reality or nature, as 100 straight people will inevitably start to result in the birth of gay people, and so the sentiment leans on an important distinction: that gay people have to somehow be “created” out of straight people. Usually, for StoneToss especially, this means the accusation that homosexuals are ‘created’ when they are abused as children. Of course the issue with this thinking is that if it takes a gay pedophile to abuse a kid in order to ‘turn the kid gay’, then where did the “original” gay people come from? It’s like a chicken or the egg question, only bigoted and stupid. Who abused the first kid to turn that kid gay? For StoneToss the answer is either to ignore the paradox entirely or perhaps his belief lays in some biblical context such as Satan or Jews or whatever other bullshit he relies on to justify his bigotry.

The obvious answer to any homophobia is that gay people aren’t harming anyone with their lifestyle. It does not need to be hidden, much less made forbidden; the mere fact that homosexuality would have to be “justified” at all is ridiculous. So StoneToss’ whole bigoted little pet theory gives him the perfect argument: Gay people do harm people, because they abuse kids because they are pedophiles!! holy shit wtf omg111!!; allowing him to completely ignore any evidence or thinking contrary to his childish hatred.

As for his ‘source’ in the description, it is a 7 page paper written by Paul Cameron, a staunchly homophobic bigot who lost his membership to the American Psychological Association for failure to cooperate in an investigation that was being conducted against himself and his conduct within the association. It’s not a long or interesting read, but you can find a free version of his shitty paper here, thanks to Sci-Hub (StoneToss links to a version of the article that is locked behind a 45 dollar pay wall, which means it’s unlikely the dumbfuck even read the paper himself). We can discuss the lengthy and convoluted invalidities of Cameron’s research, but why do that when just examining the man himself outs him for the anti-reality dipshit he is? Cameron has went on record explaining that homosexual sex is “more pleasurable” than heterosexual sex, and therefore if left unchecked, then homosexual sex will “overtake” heterosexual sex. Yes, this is the man StoneToss holds up as a shining example of “based redpill science”.

So when we get to the nitty-gritty-shitty-titty of it, we come to the real conclusion: StoneToss and Paul Cameron are just butthurt idiots who are jealous of gay people. They’re jealous of the support and ‘pride’ gay people have earned through hundreds of years of fighting for legitimacy, despite the fact this “pride” never should have needed to be earned to begin with. They’re jealous of the sexual liberation and comfort many open gay people enjoy. They’re just two childish assholes, looking desperately for any crumb of data that may validate their bigoted beliefs, terrified to the core of ever having to reflect on themselves and realize what a complete fucking waste of time and energy their, ultimately very useless, lives have been.

Haha, what a couple of cunts.

"It's MA'AM!"

Comic Name: But Who’s Counting?
Description: The left only has one rebuttal.
Mouseover: It’s MA’AM!
Image Name: only-one-joke-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/21/2021

What The Comic Is: A man jokes with this friend that he identifies as an attack helicopter. A bigoted caricature of a trans woman remarks that Right-wingers only have one joke. What follows is a series of panels where the two men make different bigoted jokes (first about genders, then women in the kitchen, then uncles molesting family members, then trans suicide) while the trans woman counts each number of joke, until finally the last two panels (left half cut-off in an attempt to create a comedic effect) shows the men holding up a mirror to the trans woman, the latter of whom responds with a deadpan “Six Jokes”.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Bigoted Rightists have more than one joke.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Wow congratulations StoneToss, you have five whole jokes. Fucking based, dude. It’s interesting, you know? I’ve read a lot about how the human brain is very good at finding patterns in things, and I’m having a total self-aware moment right now because now my brain is totally finding a pattern: StoneToss has five jokes, and ‘five’ is five more times than StoneToss has ever gotten laid by a woman! Funny how numbers at patterns work, innit?

Bigots are often accused of having only a “single joke”, and while this might be a slight hyperbole, it’s amusing to watch StoneToss haphazardly try to refute it. First of all, “two genders” and “attack helicopter” are both part of the same joke, so out of the five ‘different’ jokes StoneToss offers, two of them are the same. This translates to a solid 40% of the Right’s jokes as being the same. As for the rest? Yeah, they’re just bigoted jokes, with “41%” and “your uncle hurt you” both more or less also being apart of the same joke. Hilarious. The Right isn’t funny, can’t make memes, never has an original fucking thought and only has a very very small pool of material from which they draw their abortions of humor from, BUT AT LEAST IT’S MORE THAN ONE LOLOLOLOLOL111111 Amirite? Long Cat is Long, lulz.

This comic is the equivalent of someone accusing StoneToss of only eating shit, so he looks up from the toilet, quickly wipes the brown goo from his lips and begins to smugly explain he drinks piss, slurps cum and chews scabs, too. Cool, StoneToss! You’re an idiot and your idiocy extends to more than just a single, read: numerically one (1), thing! You’re truly a winner.

You think the Left only has ‘one rebuttal’, StoneToss? Then here’s an idea: Say something that can’t be rebutted with a single response, fuckbrain.

StoneToss: Episode 86

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon

Funny how no one says that to the Taliban.

Comic Name: Powder Keg
Description: Disclaimer: The above cartoon is intended to be enjoyed as a work of comedy and political expression and does NOT represent incitement to, or endorsement of, any form of violence or insurrectionary activity either in real life or in Minecraft.
Mouseover: Funny how no one says that to the Taliban.
Image Name: second-amendment-john-f-kennedy-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Second panel, a glare in the corner of the windshield frame.
Originally Published: 6/24/2021

What The Comic Is: A gay caricature offers a smug rhetorical to a Gadsden flag-shirt wearing gun owner, asking him what his second amendment could do against the government’s jet planes and nukes. The second panel shows United States President JFK as he rides in the back of the car he was assassinated in.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Presidents have been assassinated before, therefore gun owners can fight the military.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: God damn it. You know, I try not to make posts covering the most recent StoneToss comic because I’m trying to work my way through a massive backlog of old shit, but the guy just can’t not say something egregiously stupid and force my hand. So here we are.

StoneToss is a big proponent of the second amendment, or the “right to bear arms” and has made roughly a dozen or so comics before where he plays into this fantasy of gun owners standing up to tyrannical governments (be them the British during the revolutionary war or some strawman version of the modern day). Second amendments adherents will argue that we need high powered automatic weapons “incase the government goes rogue”, as this is (depending on who you ask) part of the reason the second amendment was drafted in the first place: to allow citizens to arm themselves for protection against what included their own government. The common argument against this (as seen in the comic) is that the the USA’s military has equipment and power far eclipsing any guns civilians have access to. StoneToss has grappled with this argument before, always doing incredibly poorly at it, and this time is no different.

StoneToss tries to zero in on a presidential assassination, in this case JFK, though really any assassination would’ve worked (and by ‘worked’ I mean ‘failed’). As you might have already learned, John F. Kennedy was the 35th President of the United States and served from January 1961 until November 1963, when he died at the hand (or, well, the bullet) of sharpshooter Lee Harvey Oswald. And it’s true, sure. Oswald was just a guy who went into a building and shot the President of the United States. But what does this have to do with the argument that gun owners could battle against the US Government? Absolutely fucking nothing.

JFK was the last US President to ever be assassinated, and it was through a pure lapse of logistics (or perhaps more to do with the fact it was assumed no one would be stupid enough to actually shoot the President, or maybe you subscribe to the conspiracy theory that it was all an inside job by the CIA). Oswald did not battle against the might of the US military to reach Kennedy, like some kind of end-stage boss battle in a fucking FPS game. These days the security of the President is taken so seriously that most people with plans to harm the political leader don’t make it within ten miles of the el presidente’s location before being picked up and arrested. And even if you did manage to kill the President, what exactly does this prove? That guns can kill someone if you shoot them? Wow, what a brilliant conclusion. I guess without the President, the US military’s nukes and jet planes suddenly stop working, like some kind of domino effect when you take out the head vampire. Somehow I think there’s a slight difference between shooting at an unarmored, unprotected man in a car who doesn’t know you’re there and shooting at a heavily armored military vehicle equipped with top of the line anti-life technology that is being piloted by a group of fully trained soldiers who already know your exact location thanks to heat mapping done by drones that are so high in the sky you can’t even see them. I mean, this is just a hypothetical anyways because if this scenario were real, you wouldn’t even see the armored vehicle full of soldiers driving towards you because you’d have already been terraformed by the tactical bombing.

But alright, alright. We don’t need to go into a big imaginary scenario where the US military attacks its own citizens. We’ve been down that road before and frankly the answer is always: There is no previous comparison (the revolutionary war, JFK assassination) that stacks up anywhere close to today’s power disparity that exists between the US military and anyone/everyone else. If we imagine a world where the entirety of the US military suddenly turns on the population, we’re fucked. No local LARPer militia or “I watch lots of military training videos on YouTube” heroes are going to stop them. the argument “but what about the Middle East!” is often employed when trying to find examples of an ‘undergeared’ militia fending off the US military, even StoneToss calls upon it by mentioning the Taliban. Well, let’s talk about that for a minute. What kind of weapons does the Taliban have? Military weapons. Where did they get them? From the US military, either directly or indirectly (many weapons and equipment were taken after government militaries abandoned them, this is due in large part to Middle Eastern militaries and their incredibly poor leadership, as they promote based entirely on loyalty rather than any other qualification). So by bringing up the Taliban, StoneToss is arguing that the US military’s equipment can be defeated, but only by a force that is using the US military’s equipment. Fucking genius. This is ignoring the sheer logistical issues the US faces when doing war in the Middle East, and that they would not be facing any of these massive problems if invading their own soil, making their war machine dozens of times more efficient and severely hampering the ability to “hide in the hills” ala Middle Eastern terrorist cells.


“Did the British army in the 1700’s have nuclear weapons?”

<StoneToss offers no reply or acknowledgement, he is too busy making a comic about molesting kids>

It's what they would've wanted.

Comic Name: Suffrage the Consequences
Description: I’m pretty sure they were pro gay marriage too.
Mouseover: It’s what they would’ve wanted.
Image Name: 2nd-amendment-founding-fathers-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/8/2020

What The Comic Is: A gay caricature smugly comments that the founding fathers would not have wanted citizens owning assault rifles. The second panel flashes back to the founding fathers, with one of them commenting that they sure hope black homosexual women will be able to vote.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: The constitution doesn’t say anything about restricting the right to bear arms, therefore it is just as relevant today as it was back then because the founding fathers wanted everything a certain way and weren’t thinking about black lesbians.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Holy fuck this comic is so amazingly fucking stupid. It’s a shoo-in for one of StoneToss’ stupidest comics of all time. StoneToss often fails to create a valid (or anything resembling a halfway intelligent) argument or observation with his comics. He normally has to lean into nonexistent strawmen or just rely on pure mask-off bigotry in order to reach any kind of point. But this is one of those StoneToss comics where the dumbfuck actually defeats himself with his own argument. You could very easily slightly edit the text in the first panel to say “The founding fathers wanted everyone to be able to own guns for all time!” and then leave the second panel as it is, and you’d have a perfect argument against gun ownership. The crux of StoneToss’ argument is that the founding fathers weren’t thinking, or caring, about things like black homosexual women being able to vote or about guns in the future being immeasurably more powerful than they were in the 1800’s. And yeah, they basically weren’t, which is why things in the USA have changed despite not being covered specifically in the original documents that founded the country.

Guess who didn’t have many rights 200 years ago? Black people, women and homosexuals. Guess who has broken barriers and fought for their right to be treated with equality and equity? Black people, women and homosexuals. Almost as if the words of the Constitution are not infallible laws meant to be eternally adhered to and our society is, in fact, capable of changing and realizing the ideals and things thought to be important in the 1700’s are not necessarily the same today. And StoneToss makes this argument for us with the second panel of the comic. What a stupid motherfucker.

Yeah, it doesn’t matter what the founding fathers were thinking about when they drafted the constitution. It was hundreds of fucking years ago. Of course they didn’t think of black lesbians being able to vote, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen anyway once society evolved and changed. If black lesbians can vote, then what’s to say the second amendment can’t be re-interpreted or changed? StoneToss certainly doesn’t make a case for it.

So thank you, StoneToss, though you’re an idiot and didn’t realize what you were doing, for agreeing with the rest of us that, yes, the founding fathers did not have the insight necessary to forge lasting fundamentals that would reach into the year 2000 and beyond. I know you were trying so, so hard to be smug and smart with your little comic, but hey. Better to be accidentally woke than unironically bigoted, I guess?

StoneToss: Episode 85

Sorry for the delay, I got caught up in unexpected Father’s Day stuff. Which YOU WOULD KNOW if you FOLLOWED ME ON TWITTER. Of course you can also choose to GIVE ME YOUR MONEY to make up for it.

It's literally a game about the haunted souls of abused children.

Comic Name: Game Over
Description: Spooky.
Mouseover: It’s literally a game about the haunted souls of abused children.
Image Name: five-nights-at-freddys-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Third panel, the computer mouse.
Originally Published: 6/17/2021

What The Comic Is: A gay man enjoys his experience playing the game Five Nights at Freddy’s. His friend (also a gay man) approaches him and explains that the creator of the game is a republican, to which the first gay man reacts with panic and shock, flinching away from the game he was just previously enjoying.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: People hate Scott Cawthon because he’s a Republican.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: I had a feeling StoneToss was going comment on this. I was expecting StoneToss to take the direction of “people who support Trump and Mitch McConnel end up getting death threats from the (((violent left)))”. This would have inherently been stupid and bigoted due to the virtue it would be StoneToss (as a self-imposed rule, StoneToss can not make commentary on anything without trying to somehow make it bigoted), but it at least would have made a better point.

So, if you’re not in the know, Five Nights at Freddy’s is a once-time super popular series of horror-survival video games developed by a single guy named Scott Cawthon. Five Nights was your classic Cinderella story of an indie dev who made a radical change in his life (Cawthon had a typical job and prior to developing Five Nights at Freddy’s he tried his hand in several failed video games that were heavily Christian/Bible-centric) that paid off big time, and for a good four or five years it made constant waves with its near yearly-releases. After around 2016-2017ish the games sort of fell out of the spotlight (the debacle that was 2016’s “Five Nights at Freddy’s World” RPG spin-off, a game that was so unpolished and rushed that Cawthon removed it from Steam and offered to refunded every purchase, didn’t help).

In the early half of June 2021 it was revealed that Cawthon had donated to Republicans that included Mitch McConnel and Donald Trump. Considering Republicans and their incredibly long history of being anti-LGBTQ, especially figureheads such as Trump and McConnel, this was not well received by very many of Cawthon’s fans, nor the greater community as a whole. That a strong core of the Five Nights’ fanbase was comprised of members identifying with the LGBTQ+, and that Cawthon obviously had to be aware of this, should not be lost on anyone. Cawthon tried to defend his donations, claiming he donated to both Republicans and Democrats (though of 18 donations only a single, comparatively smaller, donation was made to a Democrat) and that he believed Democratic candidates would have ultimately done more harm than Republicans to people such as the gay community.

So the man was targeted. Unfortunately this always results in people taking things too far, and Cawthon (and his family and friends) started receiving threats. This is never an acceptable practice, and doxxing of personal information is never a good thing no matter who it is against, but the message was clear: people were not happy with Cawthon’s direct financial support of key Republicans.

But this is really the thing: Cawthon’s affiliation with Christianity and the Right were known for years. Any fan of the Five Nights franchise would’ve known Cawthon actually started his career in indie game development by making shitty, obscure Christian Bible games. So his political allegiance isn’t really news to many of his die hard fans. And yeah, there were certainly people who were denouncing Cawthon for his political and personal beliefs (especially pro-choice) years ago. So no, Scott Cawthon did not get cancelled because he was a Republican or even pro-choice. This was not secret information. He was cancelled because he donated to people like Trump and McConnel, and then tried to double down on why he did it by explaining “Actually, guys, the Democrats ARE THE REAL HOMOPHOBES!!! Trump and the Republicans will actually do more good for them!”. Very oddly enough, gay people don’t really like it when some Bible-thumping closet bigot tries to explain to them that the political party that has historically always been the most homophobic and harmful to gay and trans people is, in reality, “actually the good one for you”.

No one really cared that Scott Cawthon was a Republican. Some might not have liked it, but you didn’t see anyone doxxing him or trying to cancel him. But when your fanbase is comprised largely of LGBTQ individuals, and you financially support political candidates that actively harmed the LGBTQ community, what exactly were you expecting? I mean, Cawthon can support whatever candidate he wants. It’s a free country. He has no direct obligation to support politicians based on who buys his video games. But people are also free to not support you when you’re donating directly against their interests and even their actual safety.

So Cawthon can stick to his guns and believe what he wants, whatever. He can try to explain and rationalize why his support of Trump and McConnel is in the gay community’s best interest. But no one is opposed to him for being a Republican. This was never what it was about. It was about his financial backing of one of the most anti-gay and anti-Trans Presidencies of this lifetime, despite the fact he made that very money off the support of the LGBTQ community.

All of this to say that StoneToss is a fucking idiot who knows he has to distort reality by under representing the truth or else his side looks bad.

[coded messages intensifies]

Comic Name: Gang Signs
Description: Lend a hand.
Mouseover: [coded message intensifies]
Image Name: hand-symbols-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/7/2020

What The Comic Is: A panel depicts various “racial signs”, such as the ‘WP’ symbol (otherwise known as the A-OK signal), the “black power” fist and the meme-y “Groyper fingers”. In the second panel, the anti-Semitic “Jew rubbing hands together” sign is shown.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: That “Jews” are their own “gang”, just like white supremacists (the WP sign) other white supremacists (the Groyper hands) and black civil rights. Therefore, Jews are equal and not somehow more vulnerable or suffer from historical persecution. Otherwise simplified as: Everyone is equal.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Yes, StoneToss, brilliant observation. It’s possible for any type of person to be bigoted. Isn’t that strange? Wow, guess all bigotry is equal and we can stop talking about it forever. Oh, and most importantly, being anti-Semitic is fine!!

We’ll ignore that the black power fist is not (in its traditional usage) meant to be a black superiority signal, as the “OK” symbol and Groyper are. For those with lives who don’t know what the fuck a “Groyper” is, it’s a stupid online movement by people who call themselves ‘Groypers’ (or an edited fat version of Pepe the frog). What is the Groyper movement? Neo-nazis. Literally just actual neo-nazis. They consider themselves ‘better’, or more ‘based’, than other far-Right leaning personalities such as Donald Trump or Charlie Kirk (the idiot from Turning Point USA). Basically they just hate the rest of the Right for not being as anti-Semitic, racist and homophobic as they are; and considering they lump people like Mike Pence into the list of “CUCKED AND NOT BASED” says a lot. So you have a symbol of black civil rights, two symbols of mask-off white supremacy and then a racist caricature of a Jewish dude’s hands. Just because a picture is worth 1,000 words doesn’t mean they aren’t all jackshit stupid ones.

StoneToss gets a lot of rep for making comics that are, especially by political comic standards, easy to understand and contain a lot of commentary in as few words as possible (much to the contrast to your typical political comic, which is usually something heavily reliant on labels and hamfisted metaphors). And to a certain degree I can absolutely give StoneToss that credit, he just makes a more appealing (read: dogwhistley) political comic, which is why he’s found success doing it. However, I do love that in these moments where he tries to be very minimalist, he absolutely fails to convey not only any real message, but also manages to create something that is devoid of literally any meaning all together. He’s tried (and failed) at this before, with such classics as episode 53’s Digging Deep and episode 57’s Oxymoron.

Even if we account for bigoted people who happen to be black or Jewish, this does not in any way make it okay for white supremacists to exist. It’s this dishonest appeal to tribalism, this sort of “We’re ALL racist and we all just stick out for our own kinds!!” argument, that idiots like StoneToss use to try and legitimize themselves or make it seem like everyone else is really just as bad as they are. Not only this, but there’s a pretty massive power disparity (not to mention number disparity) between black people who are racist against white people and white people who are racist against black people (same goes for Jews). This isn’t to whitewash (Get it? Whitewash? lol) bigotry or racism from anyone, but if you’re going to try and side-by-side compare it, like StoneToss is doing, then it absolutely bears recognizing the vast difference between white racism and black/Jew racism. Maybe a black guy can be racist against a white person, but that black person lacks all the systematic and integrated tools for oppression that the white person has, which creates a huge power difference between the two. White racism has kept black people, on a scale of millions of individuals, out of jobs, homes and better living situations since the inception of the USA. In Germany, it was white supremacy that lead to one of the largest genocides of human history.

But yeah, StoneToss, tell us again how the Black Power fist makes you nervous, you dumb shitwad. God knows it doesn’t, really. StoneToss knows he’s perfectly safe and secure, so any discussion about racism occurring within non-whites is purely a childish game concerning ego. Do you think people like StoneToss are honestly worried about “white genocides”? Fuck no, they just want a dramatized excuse to justify stomping down other people.

Perhaps stupidest of all is StoneToss using racist comic artist Nick Bougas’ (more recognizably known by his pen name, A Wyatt Mann) caricature of a Jewish man rubbing his hands together. Yes, StoneToss, yes!! Show us that JEW POWER sign that a racist white guy came up with and that isn’t used by any Jews in real life!! No no, it’s okay, there are multiple photos out there of people who are Jewish and with their hands clasped together!!

Even if everyone else were racist, it doesn’t make racism okay. And because everyone else isn’t as racist as StoneToss wants to believe, that makes this line of thinking even fucking stupider. Oh, excuse me, I mean, it makes this line of thinking even more fucking based(tm).

Ben Garrison: Episode 4

Comic Name: FILL ‘ER UP?

Yes, I too am such an AMERICAN PATRIOT that my license plate reads “USA1”. To be fair, I guess, “USA1” is a not completely uncommon vanity/novelty plate number (albeit an incredibly tacky one), but when you make a comic where the tacky USA1 license plate is by far the least ridiculous thing depicted, maybe you have a bigger god damn problem than stupid license plate numbers.

So, the Trump and Biden gas pumps seem to have both teeth and eyes (I mean, Trump’s head is seemingly looking at the man, alluding to functioning eyes), which leads me to believe they are both, on some level of their physiology and anatomy, biological. Do they contain other organs, such as hearts or intestines? Do they eat? They have mouths and teeth. Where does the matter they ingest lead to? Is it sort of like the titans from the anime Attack on Titan, where it’s an empty pit that devoured flesh simply collects in? The Joe Biden monolith seems capable of manipulating his gas pump as a type of tail or appendage, does he use it to bring food to himself or do they rely on dedicated caretakers to bring their meals to them?

Actually, come to think of it, what exactly is the function of the gas pumps?? They both emit liquid (we can see a suspiciously clear, pre-cum looking dribble at the tip of Joe’s nozzle). A-are the gas pumps their penises?? Is Ben Garrison making commentary that Trump’s pee is better than Biden’s pee? Is that what the argument is really about? Should we begin vetting our political leaders by the measurable qualities of their piss? Is this the future Ben Garrison wants?? BEN YOU PISS-DERANGED MADMAN, ANSWER THE GOD DAMNED QUESTION.

If we subscribe to the working theory that the gas pumps are indeed reproductive organs and that America fills its cars up with sperm, then does this implicate the second panel as being some kind of tentacle hentai? Yes. Yes it does. Ben Garrison draws gay tentacle hentai.

“YES, FLESH-MORTAL”, the golden Trump idol boomed, “SERVICE YOUR LORD’S LENGTHY COCK.”
The man flashed a nervous open-tooth smile and a thumbs up as he continued jerking the tip off. Would he be spared in return for his service? He felt the cold, slick tube of the Biden idol slither and tighten around his throat. He couldn’t even scream before its noose-like grip strangled him. Within his last moments of consciousness he became sickeningly aware that the answer, as it was for all before him and would surely be for all after, was no. Fill ‘er up, indeed.

StoneToss: Episode 84

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon. I swear that that Ben Garrison content is right around the corner ha ha alright it’s a comin’ along yeeaahhhh boy any second now for real any second mmmmmyeeahhhhhhhhhbuddy

He who shall not be named...

Comic Name: On The Nose
Description: An image capture of actor Mark Ruffalo apologizing and backpedaling for an earlier Tweet he published wherein he had declared Israel as committing a genocide.
Mouseover: He who shall not be named…
Image Name: israel-apology-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Third panel, fourth microphone from the left.
Originally Published: 5/27/2021

What The Comic Is: A man sits with a table of his colleagues and muses that Israel seems to have a curious amount of influence over the USA. His coworkers regard him blankly, and in the third panel the man is now giving a nervous statement before multiple news cameras and excited reporters, explaining he apologizes for the comment he made yesterday and that he is not an anti-Semite.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Zionist shadow government makes people retract any criticism of Israel.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: It’s very important to note that this comic is not “woke” on Israel or its position in USA talking points, despite StoneToss going to great lengths to strawman as hard as possible. This is immediately discernable because StoneToss is a blatant anti-Semitic person, though it might take knowing this ahead of time to understand this comic’s true context. We can practically ignore the comic itself entirely, in all its extreme strawman glory, and speak mostly about the Tweets that caused StoneToss to complain about this in the first place.

Mark Ruffalo may be familiar most to you for his portrayal of comic book scientist Bruce Banner and big angry green man The Incredible Hulk in the Marvel cinematic franchise. In late May 2021, Ruffalo made a series of Tweets that contained some criticism of Israel and called on USA President Joe Biden to step up on the situation. To the best of my finding I didn’t see any Tweets where Ruffalo actually even used the term “Genocide”, he just mentioned the forced ‘relocation’ of Palestinians. At any rate, he later retracted his statement and cited that his comments were being used to incite anti-Semitism. There is no evidence that Ruffalo was contacted by his bosses at Disney or anyone else, or that he made the retraction under any direct pressure on his job or livelihood.

So of course people like StoneToss immediately decided “Yup, Zionists control Disney and Disney is forcing their puppet to do what they want!”. It makes an attractive kneejerk, playing into the thought that all employees (especially movie stars and celebrities) are just puppets to what their employer tells them to do (which, of course, is not unique to the subject of Israel and so makes this narrative attractive to people who don’t even otherwise have a position on the Israel-Palestine situation. It’s just an easy pill to swallow: Disney actor says something controversial, Disney tells him to keep his mouth shut. It’s easy for a lot of people to nod their head to). Though Ruffalo’s retraction statement was correct: People use criticism of Israel as an excuse to validate anti-Semitism, and this is a big part of why the issue is so incredibly touchy. On one hand it’s totally okay to not support Israel’s land expansion or its current relationship with Palestine, but on the other hand you have groups of people across the world who actively want to commit holocaust 2.0. StoneToss and his ilk often use “I don’t hate Jews, just Zionists!” as a coded way of actually saying “Yeah, I fucking hate all Jews, dude.”, so they can grin and point whenever someone of note says they don’t support Zionism.

There are those that genuinely feel for Palestine and see the Israelis as aggressors, and disapproval of Israel does not automatically mean you are anti-Semitic or are actually contributing to anti-Semitism. But StoneToss’ real stance on this issue is very clear given his historical (and consistent) anti-Semitism. StoneToss and his supporters don’t feel for Palestine or worry about Israel’s position in society. For them, it’s just about hating Jews. On StoneToss’ website, the comment section of this comic is a mess of idiots posting all the classic mask-off anti-Semitic comics and misattributed Voltaire quotes about Jews (one user even said he believed the quotes to be incorrectly attributed to Voltaire, with others commenting that nope, it was true and Voltaire really did say Jews bad!!).

So now, put into all that context, we come to the conclusion: StoneToss is literally the living, breathing reason why Mark Ruffalo had to reaffirm he was not supporting anti-Semitism. StoneToss will whine relentlessly about how it’s hard to criticize Israel, but he’s the reason why. And so StoneToss victim blames. It’s the Zionist Illuminati that controls Disney that is to blame, not the flagrant and continual anti-Semitism and outright desire for violence coming from guys like StoneToss! Does StoneToss ever once stop and fucking think that perhaps if he wasn’t always being anti-Semitic and supportive of Jewish genocide that maybe it’d be a lot easier and much less socially awkward to criticize Israel? No, no he does not. Because he’s a stupid hunk of hand-me-down dildo grease.

You snooze, you lose.

Comic Name: Use It or Lose It
Description: Gun shy.
Mouseover: You snooze, you lose.
Image Name: libertarian-government-force-comic.png
Originally Published: 1/2/2021

What The Comic Is: A man wearing a Don’t Tread On Me shirt questions the man next to him, musing that if they use the government, how will they stop people from using it (the government) against them? The second man gives a disapproving stare as it revealed in the second panel that both men are lined up at an execution line, about to be shot in the back of the head.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Libertarians are dumb because they aren’t fascist (enough).

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: StoneToss wants to be smarter than everyone else. That’s how people like him operate. All of his fans, his supporters, his hardcore adherents: they’re all fair weather friends and nothing more. That is all a unity through bigotry can establish. StoneToss would drop any of them in a second if he felt he could use them as a way to feel further superior to someone else, and the same is true the other way around. The second StoneToss stops seeming fascist enough for his fascist dipshit fans, they’ll abandon him in a heartbeat. You see it all the time in hate communities: massive rifts and communal tears that form when one bigot’s bigotry isn’t bigoted enough for another bigot; or perhaps one’s bigotry isn’t the right “kind” of bigotry to another, etc.

StoneToss hates libertarians, because a keystone of libertarianism is that ‘everyone has agency for liberty’, or basically that everyone has the right to choose what they do to themselves. A hardcore pure libertarian, for instance, would believe every woman has the right to abortion while at the same time a cake shop owner has the liberty to deny baking a cake for a gay couple. You can see how libertarianism fails to protect vulnerable people (like the gay community) from oppression, and ultimately it really only supports the classes of people who are already in control (and thus benefit the most from unrestricted ‘liberty’). It is also very often used as a form of soft-fascism, with self-pronounced libertarians suspiciously only supporting liberty that benefits them specifically. And so it is very easy for a homophobic shithead to say “NO WE DON’T HAVE TO BAKE CAKES FOR THE GAYS, I’M NOT HOMOPHOBIC I’M JUST LiBeRtArIaN“, or perhaps argue against a woman’s right to have an abortion by arguing on behalf of the fetus’ liberty. You can perhaps understand, then, why “I’m a libertarian!” is usually a signal for “I like to pick and choose what liberty is as a way to support my bigotry without actively identifying with other ideologies that are openly hateful!“.

In StoneToss’ case, libertarians are simply not fascist enough. A fake “fear” that fascists like StoneToss like to espouse is that, in failing to ‘seize’ the power of government, libertarians are allowing (((others))) to take that power instead. This is what this comic is about, a world where libertarians failed to control the government and thus that same government was used against them in a DEATH CAMP OMFG THIS IS THE FUTURE LIBRALS WANT CANT YOU SEE1111. The threats that libertarianism fails to stop, according to fascists like StoneToss, are always the same things: “Cultural Marxism” (ohhh, scaaarrry), Jews and Liberals (‘Liberals’ always being synonymous with ‘LGBTQ’, which itself is always synonymous with ‘pedophiles’).

I won’t say all libertarians are bigots, but the ideology is a strong tool for those who want to, say, not afford gay people or black people with any rights. You want to open a store that doesn’t serve homosexuals or brown people? That’s not white supremacy, silly! It’s just Libertarianism. Wink wink. If society values gay people, then the FREE MARKET(tm) will naturally create a niche for gay people to exist in, and thus homophobes and people who aren’t complete shitwads can coexist peacefully. Of course if a community were to develop where no one in power or with money tolerates homosexuals (maybe say, I dunno, the deep south and rural areas), then the homosexuals can all just move away (or, like, die or whatever). And then the remaining people can coexist peacefully. Beautiful.

Libertarianism actually creates the perfect little breeding ground for fascism because it enables intolerance. The intolerant can then work to seize more power and put themselves into positions (such as say, control of political offices, armed forces and the police) where they can now exercise their intolerance on a real level. Suddenly, “I don’t have to bake cakes for you gay scum!” turns into “Homophobia has been enabled for so long it’s now forced its way into power and now we can actively murder you gay scum!“. Liberals and the tolerant aren’t going to ever do this, it’s only the intolerant idiots like StoneToss that would escalate to that level. Time and time again, any violence or ‘intolerance’ that permeates from the Left is always, always simply in response to aggression, violence and hatred from the intolerant. And here we come to this comic’s true bullshit: that the ones pulling the triggers would be liberals or Jews or Marxists or fucking whatever other group of people StoneToss doesn’t like, and that the ones bleeding to death in a ditch would be the poor, oppressed fascists. It’s the other way around.

And so StoneToss’ dislike for libertarians boils down to petty, childish slapfighting. They simply aren’t sufficiently mask-off, or mask-off fast enough, for StoneToss. The VIRGIN kinda-fascist versus the CHAD blatantly-fascist. Why can’t those stupid LOLbertarians understand that if we don’t turn the government into a tool to murder gay people and Jews, that the gay people and Jews are going to murder the fascists??? That’s totally what happens in history, right? Look at the Nazis……… Ummmmm, the NATIONAL SOCIALIST PARTY??? Socialists murdered the Jews, who were obviously the intolerant oppressors trying to destroy countries from the inside out!! If only the Jews seized the government then they could’ve murdered all the Nazis instead! This all makes sense, right? No? Wait, so does that mean this comic is also fucking stupid? Oh, it does? Huh. Imagine that.

I guess when you’re a fascist dumbfuck like StoneToss, you assume everyone else is just as terrible and wants the same thing you do (i.e., the murder of everyone you don’t like).

In the second panel, the person holding the gun is drawn with a long brown sleeve. This might be coincidental, or it could be StoneToss attempting to depict the shooter as a “brown shirt”, or similar to the original paramilitary wing of the Nazi party (who were creatively dubbed ‘brown shirts’ for the brown shirts they wore). If he is indeed depicting a brown shirt, then honestly it’s anyone’s wild guess as to what idiotic horse shit commentary he’s trying to make. You’re on your own with that one, because I need to take a shit.

StoneToss: Episode 83

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon. Also, I swear I’m working on some more Ben Garrison posts ok i love you

They too will frequently revise the projected date of doomsday...

Comic Name: Apocalypse How?
Description: Demons reading stories to children in libraries might be better sign of the end times than balmy weather.
Mouseover: They too will frequently revise the projected date of doomsday…
Image Name: climate-crisis-end-of-the-world-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Third panel, the sandal on fedora guy’s front foot.
Originally Published: 5/25/2021

What The Comic Is: A man with a wooden cross shouts on the street while wearing a sign reading “THE END IS NEAR“. A man in a fedora walks past him, humorously scoffing at the foolishness of the doomsayer. In the final panel, however, the fedora man stops, now in alarm and intrigue, at the sign of a third man who is shouting out about climate crisis in the same manner as the doomsayer.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Climate change, and the ensuing disasters that will occur because of it, are tantamount to “end of the world” conspiracy theories like the Christian Rapture or the Mayan calendar, and that people are fools to scoff at one while subscribing to the other.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Oh look, the neo-Nazi is denying climate change again. Stop the fucking presses. The comic, of course, is playing at a non-existent hypocrisy that supposedly exists between disbelieving wild conspiracy theories like “Earth will end in 2012 because an ancient calendar stopped recording days at that year” and believing science-based factual evidence that strongly suggests human-caused climate change will turn into a crisis in the near future. StoneToss, and his fellow science-denying idiots, do not have an argument because you can not argue against goddamned science, science is the mere observation of factual occurrences and therefor in order to ‘argue’ against it, you must provide observations that dismiss any already established ones, which no one on StoneToss’ side can do because they’re all clown world idiots. So in lieu of refuting factual evidence, climate change deniers have to awkwardly chuckle and throw their arms up in the air and try and explain it as “iT’s JuSt ThE wEaThEr”. This is a tidy little handwave for anyone in the pocket (knowingly or otherwise) of fossil fuel interests, but it’s also a creed expressed by hardcore Christians. Christians (like StoneToss) are unready to believe their world could possibly be based in anything other than the divine machinations of GodJebus, and thus they reject the idea that humans could ever destroy or influence something like weather (which they choose to perceive as acts of god). To the most extreme among them, the creationist castes, the world is only several thousand years old and is only meant to harbor humans until we all return to heaven and all that, after all. StoneToss, firmly rooted in idiotic alt-right “own the libs” mentality that is coupled with his bend towards Christianity, is a pathetic (but in no way surprising) advocate of science denial.

So StoneToss doesn’t argue with science, because he is incapable of doing so. And he and his ilk understand this, save for the few who are dumb enough to try using ‘science’ to argue against climate change or how old the earth is (and these few always end up making fools of themselves). So we go right back to the awkward laughing and the arm throwing, as they simply opt to outright ignore facts. The climate is changing? Uhhhmm, no stupid lib, that’s just called weather lol. These fucking idiots will be crossing their arms, stomping their feet and screaming “NO, JUST WEATHER!” even as the flood water pools around their ankles. StoneToss is especially weak in this comic, with the description referring to climate change with such a goofy and ridiculous euphemism as “balmy weather“. If that write-off was any more limpdicked, it would need Viagra just to stay flaccid.

StoneToss tries to point to the constant “climate change will destroy earth by xxxx year” fearmongering that occurs, and sure, he has half a point in that observation. The media and the occasional dramatic researcher who is hamming it up for the reporters have had a bad habit of doomsday predictions. Also, general exaggerative word of mouth has helped coin a ton of “global warming is going to make the ice caps melt by 2020- no, I mean, by 2030!!“. Point is, if you look specifically for it, you can find lots of inaccurate predictions on the major repercussions of climate change. But unlike a Mayan calendar or a biblical rapture, observable facts and logic (known as “science”) clearly show human-created climate change is driving an alteration of global weather patterns. We are having more and larger tropical storms, for instance, and sea temperatures are shifting at an unprecedented pace. All of this is a very big concept for a very little StoneToss, however, and instead of man the fuck up and live in the real world, he would rather shelter himself in a fabricated reality where no bad things are happening. What a fucking loser.

The title is a reference to the film “Apocalypse Now” (itself an adaptation of author Joseph Conrad’s 1899 novella Heart of Darkness). The reference doesn’t go any deeper than just a play on the name, though, as StoneToss asks “Apocalypse how, exactly?” the answer to which is: “through science-verified climate change, you stupid motherfucker”.

Strange how many self proclaimed butchers still have sacred cows.

Comic Name: Yellow Card
Description: In reference to Piss Christ, an “edgy” artwork of similar style. (StoneToss then links a photo showing a crucifix submerged in yellow-orange liquid that is claimed to be the artist’s actual piss).
Mouseover: Strange how many self proclaimed butchers still have sacred cows.
Image Name: pee-christ-art-comic.png
Originally Published: 12/26/2019

What The Comic Is: A man in a fedora smugly presents his latest edgy art piece: a Christian cross dropped into a jug of yummy peepee. A second man, looking on blankly and hiding a Jewish menorah behind his back, tosses the menorah into the piss. This is much to the fedora man’s intense shock.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: You can’t make fun of Jews, and that doing so would be equal to making fun of Christians.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: Holy shit StoneToss you are such a petty little bitchboy baby, lol. StoneToss made this stupid comic in response to an artist depicting a crucifix submerged in pee (as per the description explains). This comic is therefore one big pouty-cry-cry-boo-hoo childish foot stamping that translates into “But he made FUN OF JESUS!! IT’S NOT FAIR HE DIDN’T MAKE FUN OF JEWS (THIS TIME) TOO!! BAAWWWWWW!!!!“. Piss Christ is an art piece made by Andres Serrano. So, see, there’s some things you need to know about Mr. Serrano.

First, he is a life-long Catholic. Second, he explains that his work ‘Piss Christ’ is not blasphemy nor anti-Religion, but rather a kind of statement both on what he calls a “cheapening of Christ” via mass produced merchandise and a reflection of the ‘mess’ of crucifixion. Serrano actually made a similar piece, “Blood Christ”, where a crucifix was submerged into blood. This represented the blood that occurred during Christ’s crucifixion, where the piss represents “the piss and shit”. It sounds weird at first but makes sense if you think about it. The popular representation of Jesus on the cross is always very sanitized and clean, with the most extreme examples only showing a bit of ‘tasteful’ blood drips from his hands and feet. In reality, the dude was probably shitting and pissing himself constantly on the cross. I mean, it’s going to be a fucking messy way to die, after all. So whatever, Piss Christ is just an otherwise obscure art piece by an obscure artist. Oh and there’s on more thing you should know: STONETOSS FUCKING LINKS TO ALL OF THIS INFORMATION AS HIS SOURCE. That’s right. StoneToss’ own linked source is the Piss Christ Wikipedia article wherein all of this is fucking explained. Piss Christ is not an edgy anti-Christian shock piece, it’s a deep commentary by a religious man. Did the fucking idiot even read his own goddamned source?? Of course he didn’t. StoneToss never learns about anything, his entire sad fucking existence is just one kneejerk face value reaction after another. What a total, useless pile of shit. God damn.

Gee, I wonder why a lifelong Catholic felt comfortable submerging Jesus in pee… it’s curious he was comfortable with that, but didn’t do one for the menorah, even though he isn’t Jewish and has no commentary on commercialization of the menorah. God I can just feel StoneToss crying at the notion of a crucifix being dunked in pee but the Jews don’t get any of their imagery dressed up the same. It’s just so, so, so god damned childish and sad even by StoneToss’ standards. He’s like a school kid, tears in his eyes, crying about how unfair that the kid who got hit by a car this morning doesn’t have to come to school today.

So StoneToss takes a man, Andres Serrano, who undoubtedly embodies a sense of Godliness, faith and the tenants of Jesus’ love and compassion on a scale that is infinitely higher than StoneToss will ever amount to, and strawmans him as an edgy neckbeard who is shocked and awed at the “slaughtering of the golden calf”. The golden calf is something StoneToss is so weirdly obsessed with referencing, and he’s forced me to talk about it several times on this blog before. If you forgot all about it (why wouldn’t you have?), the ‘Golden Calf’ is part of the Moses mythos. You’re probably familiar with Moses and how he parts the sea so the Hebrews can escape an army of mummies or some shit, and then they walk through the desert like assholes for awhile until Moses receives God’s ten commandments. Well when Moses goes up the hill to get the commandments, he comes back down and finds that some of the Hebrews have started to worship a golden statue of a calf. This ‘golden calf’ is a false idol, something that adherents of Christ aren’t supposed to worship (I mean, “no false idols” is literally one of the shiny, new commandments). Ergo, losers like StoneToss like to employ “golden calf” is a stupid, useless, wet noodle insult that no one but them and their little circlejerk church club is bothered by. In this case StoneToss is directly attacking Jews (again) by calling their menorah a ‘golden calf’. In the world of deeply religious people this is a pretty serious insult.

StoneToss, because he is a raging bigot, does not appreciate (or even recognize) the difference between making fun of Christianity and making fun of Judaism. Christians are the dominate religion through most of the Western world, with strong influence leading up to even the highest levels of community and government in the USA. Jews experienced a massive genocide less than a single lifetime ago that is still reflected in a loss of overall population, and they still to this day face threats and violence from anti-Semitism fueled by the engineers of that very holocaust which serves as an ever-present reminder that against all good odds: it could always happen again, because there are those out there that want to make that so. HMMMM I WONDER WHY IT’S MORE KOSHER TO MAKE FUN OF ONE RELIGION VERSUS THE OTHER HMMMMMM GEE I FUCKING WONDER. StoneToss is just like your typical victim fetishist: He’s upset his religion is the one you punch up against and doesn’t like it that Jews are slightly more ‘protected’ because you have to punch down to reach them. Boohoo why can’t he be the persecuted on it’s no fair he’s going to fucking cry and make bitchy little comics about it :,,,,(. Go fuck yourself, StoneToss.

StoneToss: Episode 82

I sometimes remember to Tweet blog news and updates on my Twitter. I sometimes take other people’s money when they subscribe to my Patreon.

(Don't) Buy the Dip (Sh*ts)

Comic Name: Cyber Spaced Out
Description: Guess you better log off then…
Mouseover: (Don’t) Buy the Dip (Sh*ts)
Image Name: cryptocurrency-enviromental-impact-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: Fourth panel, look to the direct bottom right of the Facebook building.
Originally Published: 5/20/2021

What The Comic Is: A gay man tweets from his phone that Cryptocurrency is destroying the environment. It is then revealed his phone is plugged into a wall, which is revealed to be connected to a vast dystopian cityscape of dark skies and looming, ominous buildings labeled with social medias Twitter and Facebook along with video sharing website YouTube.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: It’s okay if mining for crypto coins is using a massive amount of electricity and contributing noticeably to environmental destruction, social media is “evil” and phones also use electricity.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: We’ve talked on this blog before about StoneToss and his idiotic love for crypto. There’s nothing wrong with believing or investing in crypto (at least normally), but StoneToss takes this a step further (as he and his alt-right type always do). For them, crypto is this magic currency system to remove (((them))) from ‘controlling’ currencies. Libtard shadow puppet (((governments))) with PEDOPHILE BIDEN can’t touch StoneToss’ precious money if that money is turned into Bitcoin, after all. That’s a problem on its own, but StoneToss is now making this conversation about crypto’s effects on the environment, so let’s roll up our goddamned sleeves take a goddamned look at that.

First of all, StoneToss uses the panels of this comic as an ‘escalating’ reveal. In the second panel, it’s revealed that the gay man (because of course he’s gay, why wouldn’t he be? Only gay libtard pedophile homo (((Christ haters))) would mention crypto’s environmental problems) is plugged into the wall, using electricity. Can’t he see his PHONE is ALSO using electricity?!?! And yeah it’s true, phones use electricity, amazing observation. In the third panel it’s revealed he is hooked up to, gasp, (((the internet))), which we all know is really controlled by the Jewish illuminati to make porn and articles. In the final panel, it’s shown that overlooking the entire internetscape is the evil HQ buildings of Twitter, Facebook and YouTube: oppressive overlords who routinely ban racism and hate speech!!! Those big companies are destroying the environment too, fuckin libtards!!!!!!1111

But let’s talk about that. How is crypto’s energy consumption different from charging your phone or using the internet or operating a business or any other form of energy consumption? Well, to put it very simply: crypto mining uses a lot of electricity, especially relative to what is actually being generated by that electricity. How much, exactly? Well, if we’re talking just Bitcoin by itself (Bitcoin is merely a single coin in a mass market of hundreds), the Cambridge Center for Alternative Finance measures that Bitcoin mining consumes about 110 Terawatt Hours of energy every year. 110 Terawatt may or may not sound very big to you, but to put it into frame that’s roughly 0.55% of global electricity production. This is equal to the energy consumption of countries the size of Sweden.

That sounds pretty scary, and Bitcoin mining has certainly lead to some serious problems. Can’t find a new graphics card for a reasonable price? Yeah well, guess what, that’s because they’re all being purchased en masse by crypto farmers to run massive farms. The country of Mongolia infamously dealt with the issue of entire office buildings being purchased by crypto miners, just to turn every single floor into row after row of computers set to mine for Bitcoin (this is thanks in large part to Mongolia’s very low electricity costs, making it attractive to large scale mining operations). Of course, the silver lining is that once the Bitcoins are mined and we have a good supply of them, mining no longer needs to be done.

So what the fuck is mining, anyways? What is a crypto currency? I won’t go into great detail here, but to quantify the process very simply: Cryptocurrency is a digital currency, like an “e-dollar”. It has a worth we can easily gauge against ‘real money’ like the US Dollar. In order to ‘make’ a coin, it has to be mined. Mining happens when you set a computer up to mine for a coin. The computer (or computers) solve incredibly long mathematical equations (imagine sort of like a calculator solving a one million line long subtraction problem). When the computer finishes the math problem, a coin is born (basically). You want to mine tons of Bitcoin? You’re going to need tons of computers running around the clock. This is how cryptomining consumes electricity, and it’s what people mean when they criticize the process.

But all in all, Bitcoin mining accounts for a relatively small amount of global energy use when you compare it to other things. Most opponents of crypto are vocal about the currency’s energy cost because they don’t believe crypto is worth that energy expenditure. This is entirely another argument for another time and another group of people, but what makes StoneToss’ argument here so stupid is that he’s trying to justify crypto energy consumption by vaguely pointing towards “everyone else” and saying “SEE?? THEY DO IT TOO!!”.

It’s true. Phones and companies consume a lot of energy, especially compared to what Bitcoin mining consumes. Even if we somehow accurately combine all other cryptocurrencies together, it’s unlikely they would match the energy consumption of something like the traditional (real life) money and banking system. You have to remember, it costs money to make a new dollar bill. And it costs money to load that dollar bill onto a truck, and transport it to a bank, etc. So it’s not as if Bitcoin is unique in “it has a production cost”. However, remind me when was the last time you couldn’t find a new GPU because crypto miners bought them all out? Even if StoneToss isn’t necessarily in the wrong about crypto’s energy consumption compared to anything else, this is base whataboutism that handwaves away any criticisms or thoughtful points you could level against Bitcoin. Use a gay caricature just for good measure, we don’t want to skimp too much on the strawmanning.

As a tl;dr: StoneToss’ stance on Bitcoin is a great way to very quickly summarize his entire persona: He is downright incapable of having any opinion on anything other than anime without somehow involving Jews, gays, liberals, etc. This can’t be just a comic about hypocrisy within Bitcoin detractors, it has to be about how (((gay people))) are mind controlled by (((Twitter))) into hating the CHADPILLED REVERSE-CUCKS like StoneToss. This is because StoneToss is an idiot.


Comic Name: Bad Boy
Description: If looks could kill.
Mouseover: Heartbreaker.
Image Name: ted-bundy-female-attraction-comic.png
Originally Published: 12/18/2019

What The Comic Is: A stereotypically unattractive, “nerdy” looking boy, complete with massive spectacles and face acne, pouts and wonders why girls like the guys who treat them like crap. The second panel (a continuation off the first) shows a group of adoring, heart-eyed girls pining towards someone. In the final panel (still a continuation) it is revealed the women are lusting for serial killer Ted Bundy.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Incels are right.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: StoneToss is an incel. He’s broadcasted as much before, but, as if he desperately needed to make it as obvious as possible that he’s a whiny little incel, here’s this comic. Ted Bundy likely needs no introduction as one of the world’s most infamous serial killers. Over a period of four years, Bundy killed at least 30 to 36 people (all young women) before his eventual capture (then escape, then re-capture… then re-escape and re-re-capture before finally being detained and executed on January 24th, 1989). Bundy is so famous as a serial killer because he was an attractive man who was, allegedly, so attractive and charming that people just couldn’t believe he was a deranged murderer. And this is true, some people did believe that, and some women fell in love with him.

So StoneToss is taking the oft-and-always-debunked myth that ‘women like guys who treat them bad’ and is trying to shove Ted Bundy in our faces, like “SEE? SEE? LOOK AT THE WOMEN WHO LOVE TED BUNDY, IT’S TRUE!!! FEMOIDS WANT CHAD TO TREAT THEM BAD!!!!”. The comic is essentially a bait-and-switch (or is trying to be, at least). The first panel shows a nerdy, stereotypical ‘loser’ guy lamenting as to why girls only like ‘bad boys’. Isolated by itself, this first panel seems to be adhering to the natural truth that only assholes think such a thing. However, we’re “baited and switched” when StoneToss tries to show us how popular Ted Bundy was with women. The ultimate checkmate: women love a serial killer guy!!!! omfg

This of course ignores the fact that, if anything, men are far more fervent and desperate in their love for women who murder. So we already completely skullfuck StoneToss’ idiot argument by bringing up the fact that ‘love for a serial killer’ is not a woman-specific phenomena and that, not only that, but that the it’s actually more extreme the other way around. Women killers get way, way more marriage proposals and gifts from men than the other way around. Jodi Arias would reportedly receive marriage proposals on a weekly basis for years after her trial and conviction for the murder of Travis Alexander. There are guys out there fucking tattooing themselves in Jodi Arias’ honor. If an attractive girl’s police mugshots leak, she’ll be bombarded by hundreds of men. There are websites and blogs dedicated entirely to posting “hot girl mugshots”. But yes, StoneToss, tell us more about how a few Ted Bundy fangirls prove definitively that women love being treated like shit by men, you fucking loser.

This is also blatantly ignoring why people love convicted killers like Jodi Arias or Ted Bundy. It’s not because Arias or Bundy treated the opposite gender poorly, it’s because people love to romanticize things. When weird fangirls of the Columbine High shooters romanticize them, it’s not (usually) because the fangirls like that the two went around and shot a bunch of their classmates, it’s because the fangirls are romanticizing them as “sick, twisted souls” who can usually “be saved” or “their pain is like my pain” or some other goofy bullshit like that. With Bundy or Arias, for instance, it’s that “they couldn’t have done it” or “they’re misunderstood”. In Arias’ case specifically, many of her adherents believe her victim, Travis Alexander, was trying to kill her and that the murder was just self defense. But I’m suuuuuurrrrreeee that StoneToss, being the FAIR AND BALANCED LOGIC-CHAD that he totally is, will for sure make a comic all about how pathetic and lovey-dovey the hundreds of men who are in love with women like Jodi Arias are. Yup, any day now.

Just kidding. StoneToss is going to completely ignore the existence of men who fall in love with women murderers, to say nothing of him ignoring that large disparity between how many women love men murderers versus how many men love women murderers. This is because StoneToss is a fucking incel.

StoneToss: Episode 81

You can help moderately annoy StoneToss supporters by following me on Twitter and aiding my dumb project on Patreon.

They cry out as they drone strike you.

Comic Name: The Pen is Mightier?
Description: If you think speech is deadlier than bombs, congrats, you are a Zionist.
Mouseover: They cry out as they drone strike you.
Image Name: israel-gaza-conflict-stonetoss-political-cartoon.png
Amogus: First panel, the profile picture on the phone.
Originally Published: 5/18/2021

What The Comic Is: A man is shocked to see an anti-Semitic meme shared by the Red Crewmate. The second panel reveals the man to be a Jew, evidenced by his silly little Jew beanie. He remarks with concern, wondering if genocide is next. In the background, from beyond a border wall, bombs strike Palestinian buildings.

What StoneToss Actually Thinks: Israel shoots missiles at Palestine, therefore it’s okay to be anti-Semitic.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: The bombings shared between Israel and Palestine is wrong, most honest people will admit this. Though the USA (who deeply supports Israel) will always pussyfoot around criticism of military action (go figure, the USA quietly twiddles its thumbs when someone else is doing the bombing for a change), this doesn’t mean it’s illegal to criticize Israel for bombing Palestine (or vice versa, though it should always be considered that due to the support the USA, Israel will always maintain an unfair upperhand against Palestine).

However, no matter what, Israel doing anything is not a green light for anti-Semitism, or for the minimalization of bigotry. And here’s a flash of news: All Jews actually don’t live in Israel, did you know that? (StoneToss knows that; he can’t go a single fucking day without thinking about all the Jews that live in the USA. Don’t they know it’s supposed to be FOR WHITE (Non-Jew) PEOPLE ONLY???). StoneToss feels anti-Semitism is either okay, or at least minimal, in the face of Israel killing Palestinians. Far from some kind of fair logic, this is literally Nazi-level anti-Semitism that is used to justify the escalation to genocide. Perhaps anti-Semitic memes alone are not one step away from genocide, but the normalization of them under the justification of “but Israel, that place where Jews live, is militarily aggressive” is.

The comic’s title (and then its description) are a reference to the old adage “the pen is mightier than the sword”, commonly meaning that you can get more done with diplomacy rather than warfare (or that no matter how hard a war is fought, it will be diplomacy that leads to resolutions). StoneToss is trying to flip the meaning of the quote around to further justify his anti-Semitism. Memes about Jews being evil aren’t as bad as bombs, so why do people care so much when StoneToss hates Jews?! This isn’t the first time, and it won’t be the last, that StoneToss attempts to minimalize anti-Semitic trolling/memes/hate speech, and while it is always a tactic to try and normalize bigotry (and therefore grow it, such as into general public sentiment and then political office), it is also always stupid as fuck.

With the description, StoneToss attempts to strawman anyone who thinks anti-Semitism is wrong. “Oh, you think we shouldn’t spread bigoted memes?? Don’t you know Palestine is being bombed??? You just think words are worse than bombs, congrats, you’re a Zionist (and this is inherently a bad thing of course, because that means you support Jews!!). Dishonest rhetoric is thankfully a very weak tool that is easily crushed if it’s opposed whenever an idiot attempts to employ it.

oi, where's your immigration loicense?

Comic Name: Ballot Blocked
Description: Today we have a special guest comic from Café, a Spanish speaking cartoonist. (the description includes a link to the artist’s long-since suspended Twitter along with their somewhat popular Facebook page)
Mouseover: oi, where’s your immigration loicense?
Image Name: british-election-cafe-monera-guest-comic.png
Originally Published: 12/16/2019

What The Comic Is: A man wearing a suit with the Communist symbol on it listens as a worker in hardhat and overalls complains that “they” need less immigration. The man offers instead to “give” more Muslims and gays, much to the anger of the worker. In the final panel it is revealed that the labour party has lost an election.

What Café Actually Thinks: Literal mask-off bigotry.

Why It’s Fucking Stupid: First of all, “Gays” are not immigrants. Just throwing it out there quick. Anyways, so this ridiculously bad comic has the worker as a stand-in for the everyman, a generic metaphor for all of the voters in the UK. A great way for someone like Café, who lives in Mexico, to try and strawman the entirety of the UK people. The other guy, some kind of generic labour party politician, promises “more gays and Muslims” instead. Yeah, who would ever vote for a politician that is tolerant of gay people and Muslims, AM I RIGHT?

StoneToss at least (usually) tries to hide his bigotry, or present it as somehow being a non-PC twist to the side of enlightened logic. It’s amusing when he features guests like this who can’t come up with anything other than “BIGOTRY IS AWESOME LOL”. If there’s one good thing you can say about Café and their shitty comics, it’s that they’re not going to sway anyone. No one will look at a comic like this and think “I value myself as a closet bigot moderate, and this really inspires me to be more open about my hatred of other people” in the same way StoneToss does. A comic like this can only elicit either a “Wow, this comic is very dumb” or a “LOL I HATE GAY PEOPLE AND MUSLIMS TOO” reaction, depending on how much grey matter vs. shit your skull contains.

But we do get a great example of how StoneToss works. This comic says nothing, it contains literally zero message. It’s not a commentary on anything, it’s not trying to expose some kind of “Leftist hypocrisy” (a hypocrisy that never exists, of course, but honesty/reality isn’t the point), it’s just base bigotry. It’s the artistic equivalent of dryly stating “I hate gay people”. StoneToss might be a fucking idiot, but at least he makes comics that are worth evaluating. This is why StoneToss is so popular. Not because he makes ‘good comics’ (he doesn’t), but because he appeals to bigots due to the fact that his comics can, sometimes, be reasonably argued to only be “an unpopular opinion” or something like that. When people ask me why I bother maintaining a blog like this and analyze StoneToss comics, this is exactly why. StoneToss isn’t like this Café moron. His comics are fucking dumb, but they have a depth to them that is worth exploring and explaining fully; so the next time some fucklehead is running his mouth on Facebook about how something like a coded anti-Semitic comic is “just an opinion about Israel”, you can link him a blog he won’t read because he’s a knowingly dishonest idiot. But at least other people can learn from it, no?